I didnt want to believe that my best friend/ex-girlfriend would ever abuse me physically or emotionally, but my therapist made me realize I dont deserve this and I need to get out.
I have no idea where to start. I want to get out, but I am scared. I cant keep this unhealthy friendship; it is dragging me down.
Please give me advice. I need it
athletic
did your therapist give u any help in leaving this situation safely?
where are u trapped by this ex? do u attend the same work place? live together? or is it just in general that she is where u go?
pls help me to understand the ramifications of this problem so that i can try and help knowing the facts, it wont do u any good if i ramble on about a friends sofa if its not the housing that is the issue.
meanwhile i hope your therapist is helping u to deal with this
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
She told me to call Spruce Run and see what they have to say
We attend the same school. First we started off as best friends, then we dated now it's back to best friends. I think us dating is what caused our relationship to turn south.
It's physically hard for me to defend myself again her because she is bigger and stronger than me. I feel so helpless. When I tell her to get off or not touch me she doesnt listen or respect what I am saying. That really upsets me.
I dont know what to do. I am scared
oh hon
its always a scarey feeling when u are dominated by someone else have u thought about taking a marital arts course in self defence? another thing u can do is try and alter your tone of voice so that she knows there is no messing?
sometimes relationships are meant to be kept to the friendship stage only and after a relationship its hard to go back to be friends with all the shared history.
do u have other friends who u can hang out with and so create distance that way?
dont give up hon there is a way thru u just need to hang in there
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
ps what did spruce run have to say?
D :)
I don't know about be physically dominated by a girlfriend, but I realized that mental abuse is very destructive, and finally realized that i had to get out of a relationship at the end of high school, did that, and the had to treat the person like an addiction and just not have any one on one contact. We were friends than dated, and became friends again later when I found other relationships were better, and non abusive. Found out many years later that she married and her husband committed suicide after they ended a 15 marriage in divorce. Glad I dealt with her early and pray to God you do the same (not because of the suicide thing) but just for your personal growth and happiness.
AA23, your situation sounds like the reverse of what more women experience in relationships. Has your therapist given you steps to take to guide you out of the situation? As Jim described in a different manner, treating it as an addiction can be helpful if thats the case, you made need to keep you distance as D said by keeping very busy for a while w/other friends/events to attend, then you can start to line yourself up for other options in steering clear of her, from what you described your aware that shes bullying you. Do you have any family members that may assist in helping you? Maybe talking w/the school counselor could be helpful.
All my strengths.
April
I am now out of this relationship. One day I told her how I really felt and that I needed out. I did what I had to do to protect myself. I am so much happier now that I am out of that relationship. She still texts me sometimes and asks to have me back and to harass me, but I have learned to ignore it because she doesnt deserve my time nor my energy.
Thank you everyone for your support :)
athletic
well done hon, its great to see u moving on and forwards and that u are now happier
good for u for ignoring the hassel and good luck in the future
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
Thank you so much! It took a lot, but I did it. :)
athletic
and u should be proud of all u have achieved and know that u are a stronger person for the experience
i wish u well hon
as always loving thoughts and positive vibes
D :)
Thank you so much for your support! :)