I really like this guy

i haven't been on for a while because i've been feeling fine and not thinking too hard. well a couple of weeks ago i met this guy who is really really great. i've gotten so good at seeing the signs of an abuser early on and staying away from that. this guy has none. he has a great family he's close to, no mental illnesses, he's really nice and treats me well. so logically he seems great. but i'm so scared that i am wrong. i can't handle anymore abuse in my life. i'm holding it together now because i have to, but i don't think i could if it happened again. but so far he is perfect and i don't want to mess it up by worrying about this, but i also don't want to let my guard down. i try to talk to my friends about this but none of them get it and they all think i'm being ridiculous. maybe i am, but i'd rather be slightly ridiculous now than beat up in a few months. have any of you been through this? i let my guard down last time and got screwed over badly.


I am happy that you are doing well. He sounds like a nice guy. I think you should continue as you are. It hurts to be on guard for everything, but there is so much hurt from the past that you feel you have to. Try and just take it as it comes and let it fall into place that way. Believe me I know what it's like to want so bad to let go a be free. Enjoy the good while it last

might_aswell_live - i am do happy that you met a nice guy and really hope that it works out for both of you. Don’t think for a second that you are being ridiculous, it is very normal to hold onto those feelings from the past and not want to get hurt again. Take it slow and see how things go. But also if you do like him and want to keep moving with the relationships, slowly let him know what has happened to you and why you may want to move slow and see how it goes. If he is a good guy he will understand and support you.

From Substance Abuse to Mental & Physical Abuse