I want to cry so much right now. I feel broken up inside and I don't know who to turn to for help. I just wish I had someone to talk to.
Whats going on
A lot of stuff...
I've been blaming myself for my grandfather having abused me. I feel like what happened to me was my fault and it's making me feel disgusted and angry with myself. I hate myself because of it. I'm also feeling incredibly lonely and alone. Which makes me feel worse and recently I've been having more moments where I feel completely disconnected. And when I do feel it's a very extreme feeling of pain, sadness, and anger. It's been hard lately. So hard that I've been wishing for bad things to happen to myself. Then I feel like I can't talk to anyone because the only friend I have is too young to talk to about this and the only other person I see enough is my mom who doesn't like talking about these things with me and I am afraid of her for some reason. I'm starting to get tired both physically and mentally and I don't know what to do anymore. So I don't do much with myself and I think it's making me more depressed.
@mynamemattersnot I get it