I want to tell myself to stop giving/helping/trying to anticipate everyone's needs. It's just my unconscious way of existing, and I realized no one else EXISTS like that. I know people will say oh the world needs more of that we appreciate it, but you dont f ing understand, it's actually harming me to be like this and I cant stop, it's like a tick. No one gets it, and no one understands how it upsets me that I cant relate to other people besides like this. Ive tried so fing hard to stop, and then realized i end all ny interactions by trying to care about other people. I do it as a hobby, I do it because I know what it's like to have no one, I do it because I cant help it. The only time I talk abojt myself is here in this STU PID posts. I am super angry at myself. Im not angry at other people because when everyone treats you the same, the problem isnt with them, it's with me.
@CKBlossom yeah, Im going to try to slow down and focus on what I want to say and do, although people just talk over me if I do that. idk I struggle to talk about myself in general maybe that has something to do with it.
It's a habit we fall into when we were raised by toxic parents. We learned as children to be hypervigilant and anticipate the needs of everyone around us in an attempt to avoid harm. It was literally a survival tactic. I don't have any advice as far as how to counter it because I still do it and I don't know how not to. Just want you to know I get it.