I was dumped, and i really need help

Im a 29 year old female, no kids, never married. I’ve been single and celibate for years. I met a guy December 2010 of an online site. He began calling me every day, all day. So I talked to him a lot on the phone and he seemed extremely interested in me. We began hanging out 3 times a week. I met his friends and family and hung with them. I was also at his house all the time, and he always wanted to see me. We had sex after the 3rd date, but he stuck around and it didn’t feel like he was using me. We were a couple. Every day he told me that he cared about me and missed me. He told me to delete my dating account after we had sex and he did the same.

He seemed like he cared so much and he talked about our future and all the things we were going to do. He called nonstop until the day he broke up with me. He even called for about 3 more days after that. So after 2.5 months he has decided that he doesn’t want to be with me anymore and that we needed to develop a friendship first. How did he just turn his feelings off from me? I didn’t do anything to him. I thought we were building a friendship since we talked so much. I feel so hurt and abandoned.

I was so happy that I ignored a lot of flaws in him. For about a month into the relationship I was very submissive and passive, and I didn’t speak up for myself. I saw a decent man that had the potential of being a good future husband, educated, employed, no kids, home owner etc. And I was blinded by these qualities. I didn’t want him to think i was a nag so ignored a lot of bad things that he did.

After a while I learned that he was very stubborn, would not compromise, everything had to be his way. This made me upset sometimes. Sometimes I would cry when I thought he was being unfair. When I was upset, he would not comfort me at all. He seemed to get mad when I got upset….he would avoid the situation. He would not communicate with me about problems in the relationship, and accused me of complaining because I wanted to discuss the problems. I wanted to compromise with him, but he would always tell me that we will never agree on it. These were simple problems, but he didn’t want to work on them. He always thought he was right. He never saw fault in the situations even though he caused a lot of problems. Also even though I spent lots of time with him on the phone, we really weren’t talking about anything much. He wouldn’t take my conversation serious at all. It was just idle conversation, or him talking about his hobbies and how I would have to participate with him in the summer time.

Also, he placed many demands on me, and told me that this is what he needed to be happy. He would get mad because I didn’t want to spend the night at his house, cook or clean for him…it was just too soon for that. I’m a student and i was too tired for that at nighttime after class. He didn’t understand that I am a fulltime college student and I go to night school. I always had to drive to his house because he said he was too tired to pick me up…he lived 10 minutes away. I would come visit him 2 to 3 times a week, but he barely came to my house that is 10 minutes away. He always made time to hang with his friends and drive to them. He did take me on dates and stuff once every week or 2. It’s like he wanted an instant wife or slave to just make him happy, but he didn’t care if I was happy. I told him in the future I would cook, clean whatever, I just need to take care of my priorities first. He kept telling me that he needed a partner, someone that can bring something to the table. He put me down a lot because I live with my mother. I’m in school working on a second master’s degree so I didn’t have money to live on my own.

When I first met him he was the nicest man I ever met, he was very affectionate and lots of hugs and kisses. He turned on me after a while and began treating me coldly when I started to comment about his behavior.
I found out that he has been married 3 years ago, and the marriage lasted 3 months. He was dating another female for 3 years. He has had several shorter 7 or 8 month relationships that didn’t work out. He seems to always have to be in a relationship. He is 29, no kids.
At night I dream about him, about how nice he was to me in the beginning. Its been a long time since a man cared about me. I wake up sad because he is gone. Sometimes I blame myself for him dumping me. Kinda makes me wish that I would have cooked for him, cleaned, done whatever he wanted. I just thought that me giving him my time, driving to him on a regular basis and being with him was enough for this new relationship. I had no ideal that I would chase him away. I miss him a lot, and I want the hurt to end. I try to communicate and compromise with him, he just didn’t want to work with me. But he said he cared so much. I am a good woman, never cheated in my life, and I am a good friend!
I can’t believe im acting like this over a 2.5 month relationship.

Give me some advice. How can I fix my heart? What should I did differently? I know he isn’t perfect, but I still fell in love. It hurts bad. Why did he claim to care so much, and then run away like I never existed? Part of me blames myself. Did he care about me at all? I opened myself up, and now i will worthless.

There is nothing you could have done differently. If you did then you would not be you, he is a guy and they tend to be little boys sometimes. You have a right to speak up for yourself and still be a lady, without a guy getting all bent out of shape. I know that you had saved yourself for a long time and that you still have feelings for this man, but you have to not put yourself in a funk about it. If he wants to move on let it be, you know yourself and will be ready the next time. Good luck and hang in there.

I agree that you acted how you acted throughout and thats exactly right.
Allow yourself a broad spectrum to feel how you feel without the added weight and pain of self judgement.
The healing of the heart is a time thing with no schedule..be it a relationship of 3 days 3 months or 3 years.
Just as unique as you and your lifes experiences are..so is this relationship.
You may experience hatred and remorse one moment and deep love the next about experience you felt the exact opposite about hours earlier- Thats OK and thats right..you are complex and it sounds like the short intense nature of this may have you in a bit of shock and trauma..the un explainability.. trust in time more will be revealed so long as you love yourself NO MATTER WHAT

Thank you both for your help. I read your comments, and i have decided that i cant cry anymore and that i will pick my head up and move on. I am very hurt and tramatized, but i dont want to be a victium of him anymore.

Good for you, see you are getting there. It always takes time to heal some things take longer than other. It will do you lots of good and you will feel better.

Hi-
Thank you for taking time to write about your relationship and I am so sorry that you were hurt.
You're story is exactly the same as mine. I have dated on line for three years. In three years, the three guys I dated lasted a few months and they all went exactly like you described. They call all the time, they write and text and tell you they miss you and want to see you every available moment. It's a wonderful whirlwind romance. But then they start acting demanding, cruel and demeaning.
It seems with on line dating, if there is a bit of a hiccup in the relationship, some men who have emotional issues, feel that they can sign back on as there are so many other women to chose from. I believe some men that use the sight have an addiction to their computer that leaves them masking intimacy.
It appears that dating on line has caused some men and women (not all) to think they can leave whenever they want and just pick someone else to use for a couple of months until the new person they are seeing notices the same behavior. They can't fess up because they refuse to see that the heart of a human being is a gem and a treasure...not something that is easily tossed away.
You have to feel the beauty and love in your heart, it comes across so much in your post. I hope you continue to find ways to love yourself and be gentle on yourself during this time of healing and discovery.
You've helped me greatly by reaching out, thank you.

Sorry about the situation. I relate to you as I went through a difficult breakup with a man who was emotionally abusive to me. I actually received e-counselling that was provided for free by my work to help me get through the pain. I also had been without a partner for a long time. Here is what I can share with you from my experience. Firstly, my own opinion is it's best to hook up in person, not online dating or whatever, but thats my opinion. You are the most important person in the world to yourself. You are the person you have to live with. Be true to yourself above all and in any relationship make sure your needs are being met. The man I was with also had me believing in his "potential", not what I saw in front of me. You are better off alone than being with that man. Take care of yourself now, do things that make you feel good or lift your spirits. You deserve it. I also felt tremendous pain and feeling of being abandoned. I think what it comes down to is that you have to love yourself fully. You only wanted to be close to someone and share your love, you did nothing wrong there. But like me, you wanted things and him to be what they were not. Accept the reality, accept your feelings, don't deny what you feel. Let yourself feel the pain, it will pass in time. You are stronger than you think and you will get through this. In the future listen to your inner voice and intuition and always be true to your inner voice. It will protect and guide you. No one will ever care for or protect you as much as you yourself. So remain committed to yourself. You will find a man to be with that you can be in a loving,mutual relationship with when the time is right. Right now give yourself time to heal and cater to yourself. Stay active as possible with things you enjoy or new things you want to try. Sports, yoga, writing, good friends, whatever makes you feel good, joyful. Do those things for you. Put this experience behind you and now you know some better things to do in your next relationship, just like me! Next time take it much slower, get to know the man really well, and always make sure your needs are being met and he treats you with respect. I recommend the books by Beverly Engel, you will get a lot of great tips on relationships and self-care. Remember, you are strong and day by day the pain will get less and less. Like the previous post said, be loving and gentle with yourself, you deserve no less. I am much older than you and have never been married and you know what, the most important thing is not whether we have partner or not, it's that we love ourselves and are good and kind to ourselves and others also. Love takes many forms and you can express your love to everyone and everything you encounter, people,animals,nature, but you MUST love yourself first and care for yourself just as you would anyone else. Do not contact this man again, he is not what you need in your life. There is nothing wrong that you live with your mother if you are trying to get another degree. Spend time with your good friends, you do not want to be with a man who "puts you down a lot". Again, I recommend the books by Beverly Engel, great books for women about male/female dynamics in relationships. All the best.