I was recently diagnosed with BPD. I had my only child at 26

I was recently diagnosed with BPD. I had my only child at 26 wks and was then diagnosed with post partum depression so I've always felt like there was something not right with me but to hear BPD, I'm just in shock. It's not that I'm denying that I have it, I don't know how to accept it. Since then, I've been more awake to the symptoms of the disorder and my boyfriend is telling me to "figure out my emotions cause I'm done playing these little bs games." I feel like I cant help it. When in a situation I just loose it. Instant reactions, depression, aggression, impulsivity, thoughts of not wanting to be here... all of it. I don't know how to control it. And even after a bad situation I'm left in a depressed state of mind. I just want something that will take these feeling away! I feel so detached, abandanded at times from friends and even my boyfriend. I barely have energy to play with my now 3 year old. I just want my f**kin brain fixed! :(

2 Hearts

The main thing to focus on is that you can recover. You can definitely have more even emotions in your life, my advice is educate ourself as much as you can about the "I hate you don't leave me" Borderline symptoms, and find out how you might be doing that to your boyfriend. Remember, you can get past this ! You can become aware of what you're doing, and reach out for help, we are here for you. Ask as many questions as you can, I sure don't mind, at all. I can also PM you an article I found that put a twist of humor/life on our situations, if you'd like to read it. :D If not, that's okay, don't get overwhelmed right now.

1 Heart