I was struggling earlier this year bad with anxiety around I thought men who I thought were just interested in me. Today went to dog park and saw group of guys... I thought to not even go into the dog park... that’s how bad my anxiety... I went but didn’t stay long. I felt so uncomfortable and anxious. I feel like I need to go back to therapy. This makes me feel like such a loser like I will never be normal.... has anyone else had problems like this after abuse?
I'm not sure what you mean. ARe you saying you have anxiety around men who you think are interested in you? Or are you afraid they wont be interested in you?
No I think I just have anxiety around men in general post abusive ex narcissist
@Foundlove I understand what you 're talking about now. Yes, I have the same issue. If I am remotely attracted to a guy, I don’t know how to handle it anymore. I can’t handle myself. I get so insecure and nervous. I deep down feel like they wouldn’t REALLY be interested in ME as person, or creating a real relationship with me. I over think about something that hasn’t even happened and just live in fear. I don’t talk to me, I don’t go on dates. I literally just stay away from all of it. I don’t know how to approach dating. I don’t know how to even start. Even if I was able to go through a conversation, I wouldn’t be able to believe that anything real could come out of it.
I had some anxiety in regards to women when I was first post narcissist. I had been conned before and I wasn't very trusting of women. It was actually the women in this group that helped me to understand that it wasn't women in general but rather the ones I chose to associate with. I went to work on myself addressing my childhood insecurity, trying to get to a point where I wasn't attracted to certain types of people. For me I was vulnerable to the wounded duck routine. I also worked at establishing firm boundaries so that I wasn't attractive to these same personality types. It's all a process that takes time and sometimes a lot of work to where we feel comfortable with certain types of people again.
@Ducktape I’m more comfortable around women… I’ve had bad experiences with men in my past. I feel like In general my whole life I’ve had social anxiety worse towards men… but I feel like maybe could be worse now. I will keep trying to be around groups of men and group of people. I think that’s what I have to do in order to overcome that.