So I just wanted to tell you of a recent accomplishment. I made an ice cream date with a friend because at my university the ice cream is famous, and I hadn't gone yet. So obsessively I was checking all the nutritional facts- which by the way this ice cream cant be sold anywhere else because the fat content is too high or something- and decided I would just get frozen yogurt= low fat, little guilt, wouldn't freak out. So I decided on Strawberry (hate vanilla haha).
So my friend and I get there. I was all prepared. And I look at the sign for flavors being sold today. I see ice cream, ice cream, ice cream.... and under Frozen Yogurt reads on measly sign- Vanilla. Panic mode! I didn't want my friend to think I was weird by just mindlessly standing there not knowing what to do and secretly counting out possibilities. So I went to the counter and, I have no idea how I figured this out or how I picked it, and blurted out some coffee/chocolaty ice cream- delicious and forbidden.
So I am eating this huge mound of ice cream and talking with my friend. I was ENJOYING myself! On the walk home I figured out how much I ate and had a little freak out session- mini freak out. So I was talking to Kasee who said "Its Just Ice cream." And I laughed at myself. Its Just ice cream Its not going to kill me or somehow make me gain weight over night. And I also did my meal plan calculations and it still fit!
Lesson learned- ice cream is not worth freaking out about :) Its just yummy - especially the flavor I picked out today
That's so good to hear Alle!! Icecream is a hard one for many of us I think, but it is a nice treat. I especially love Dairy Queen Blizzards.
And everything comes in moderation, right? No one is going to force you to eat a huge amount of ice cream every single day because of this incident and that little bit is not going sit in your body for months adding pounds onto your body like an evil monster (as I once thought)
Indulging yourself is good for the mind, and body...and I do love chocolate :)
I'm so proud of this accomplishment for you!!
Paige xoxo
this is an awesome step that is hard for many of us with ED to overcome and you did it ! when i started adding new 'delicious' things to my meal plan or try something i wouldnt normally have ----it was rewarding. i got so sick of my stale meal plan! i was almost releived to try other things! i am adding new things into my meal plan nearly every day now--and it gets easier to do the more i do it. when i eat something and i dont gein weight the next day----and i worried so about it---i was like--wow i didnt have to worry. and lets say --if my weight does go up a bit, i dont fret about that much either... as much as i did. it is a body--it does things i cant control. and i am at ease with that now much more. being in control --means giving up ED. ED thinks it is in control but it is not control.
Thanks. I have no idea how I accomplished this. Maybe its my new strength in my boyfriends support. Who knows? And personally now that I think about it its good to have something to treat yourself every once in a while- like you said Paige. I feel as though when I would starve myself from those things (forbidden list) and of course most foods as well, I would end up binging especially on those "treats" such as cookies and ice cream. But if I allow myself the occasional treat and fit it into my meal plan and plan it out more (so I don't freak out) then I won't have the urge to binge and my meal plan will be more stabilized. I think that after my whole messy two weeks of crazy ups and downs I am finally getting it with the whole meal plan.
Allee...thanks for sharing this! It's great that you could allow yourself to enjoy this treat, and now beat yourself up....you deserve this, and balance and moderation is what a healthy life is about!
Have a great day....Jan ♥
Allee.... way to go! this is awesome. i bet we all struggle with being able to, every now and again, enjoy a simple pleasure like a great cup of ice cream. this is really motivating and i am so happy for you to have been able to enjoy your treat! it's a lot more than just the ice cream.... great job. so happy for the corners you have turned this week in dealing/coping with your ed!
thats awsome you were able to enjoy the icecream. If you think about it there is soo many normal eaters out there eating ice cream and feeling unguilty. What makes us undeserving of a such a harmless treat? So you go girl !!
Wow, I am really impressed. I completely relate to the feelings you had about the frozen yogurt ending up as vanilla. I would have made a fool of myself and probably not been able to order anything at that point. And if I had ordered something else, I would have obesseed about it for days, really beating myself up for "pigging out." I am inspired by the way you handled it and hope to be that strong too..
Oh my good for you! I know it is SO hard to get back on that kind of track. It was ALOT of foods for me when I was recovering from ana. But most of all, I gotta say it was the pizza for me. During anarexia I HATED pizza and after recovering I sill kidna do. When my mom made me eat it for my weight gain I felt like and utter pig. But looking back, depsite how much I yet had processed pizza, I would have no problem eating it now as a treat! (unless it has meat on it.)Now, I can eat icecream,. chocolate and cheese without freaking out my panties! Its a beautiful thing nd it makes you feel liberated! It make s you feel human! It feels like you are free again from those strong chains. Really it does, depsite how cheesy that might sound. A small miracle may I share with you quickly. At school you can imagine how often people treat other people with treats. Well this one substitute was offering peices of chocolate to the kids just this ended December. She offered me one peice from the box as she went my way. I would normally wil just smile and take a peice and throw it out later. But infact I took a sq. or dark chocolate and ATE it anyway. I know this may sound funny but that is a stepping stone for me. Just yesterday one of my freinds offered me her homemade spice cupcakes from her locker (sketchy i know but I know she is a wholesome person) but famished from the school hunger I took one and ATE it with pleasure! Agin, may sound quite ridiculous for being proud of myself for enjoying a treat but its TRUE! Thats sense of liberation is great! Just remember a treat here or there is normal, good and even healthy for you mind, spirit, emotion and even body. You are not alone in this process.