Idk a title

i felt really invalidated by my mother today, i started crying bc i dont want to live in this world because i hate the way it is and she said i shouldnt be crying bc thats the way it is and there is nothing to do about it, my head is thinking its right to think this way and that i should do therapy again, most people will agree with her and yes i should learn that the world is like this, but i can totally not accept to live like this and find some other way to live, my annoyance lately is unbearable, its the only thing my mind is focusing on and i have no idea how to stop it, i still think about it when im high and i want to get drunk and forget. My job keeps putting the blame on people leaving on me, when the students that left are adults that apparently also can deal with life and i fucking hate most of them and how everything is dealt, they dont want to listen to my side, they only consider me a problematic person and teacher because i dont comply with their rules and it will affect my future in other jobs probably and i have absolutely no future in this bloody industry and its basically all my fault, which is one of the things i hate the most, i still think its both parts fault, thoughts?

Do therapy again
Your mom sounds like a mean and spiteful person
Never let someone like that get you down. Please do not get drunk, it does not take the pain away. I hope my message reaches you and you feelings are valid , how you feel matters and do not let anyone confuse your mind. I am here to talk if you need support

1 Heart

I think I have the same kind of thinking as you do. The system we follow our whole life, feels like we’re constantly following the crowd and indirectly told what to do at all times (feels like slavery). It feels like we’re so active for the benefit of the society, yet so passive to ourselves. I personally want to follow my own rules and work at my own rythme… I think in this case just don’t give importance to people that think differently. I think most people have been “compelled” by the society and there’s sadly nothing you can do. But I definitely think that your way of thinking isn’t wrong at all since I relate to it. On the contrary, it makes you more real, more connected to yourself. When I talk about it to people, I get approximately the same response as the one your mom gave you; they tell you that “it is the way it is”, “you have the right to disagree, and think differently, but you still have to live life like everybody else no questions asked”… You can try to find your own way, build your own life, start your own project or work different jobs so you don’t feel like you’re stuck in one place at one job all the time. Maybe try therapy again if you feel like it could help you find your way. I hope I understood you alright and that my answer wasn’t completely out of context. I’m here if you need to talk just know drugs or alcohol will make it worse :blush:

She isnt like that really, i think she is just tired of me complaining about the same things for a while. Her helfpul resources are usually nonsense and astrology related, which i dont really believe. She has helped many times but now its just more of a suck it up life is like this attitude. Thanks Jas

No problem. I understand you want more pratical resources, you can do rrsearch on what you can do but PLEASEE focus on feeling okay mentally before getting a job. Your feelings and mental health matters so her dismissive attitude is very ignorant.
Its no problem

I dont think i can be mentally well if i have to work, specially if the only thing i can do are things i dont want to

What exactly about work don’t you like?

Lately everything. Teaching became boring and repetitive, the students on this school are ignorant pieces of shit, they are dumb as humans and in our first language. The school has stupid rules we have to follow and most of them are unwritten and we are not aware until we do something wrong, the owner is stupid, the sistem sucks, they depend on the teachers and yet we receive nothing. The owner wants unprepared people to teach every level of english with every difficulty, he doesnt want people who study english, he wants young people to pay less, he is close minded and doesnt change

Ah. Now i get it. Honestly you can get a vacation and do not internalise these kids feelings.
Most kids is the TikTok generationn so their attention span is cut in half. Your reasoning is justified, I get you so please be patient and work on ypur mental health.

I dont believe the attention spam thing and what kids thoughts?

Oh as in their attention span is lessened due to the use of Tik tok, they cannot focus on one thing at a time and their learning was impacted.

I know what they say about attention spam on the newer generation, but what kind of kids thoughts you were refering to here?

I meant like they usually think everything is boring once it does not require a tablet or Ipad.
Obsessed with gaming or content that is quick and fast. Super stimulating content that does not require the brain to think.
This type of content provides instant gratification and as a result kids have lowered attention spans.

I don’t think it is you. If you check on social media teachers were saying that kids today are difficult to teach.

What i dont understand is where is the connection from what i said to your comment on kids and attention spam, also, that work is not a problem anymore, as i have been fired recently lol

Whoops I think I posted talking about the kids on here on accident. Sorry about that I got messdd up with one of our PMs.
Well time to focus on yourself now