I'm getting bad again.. I've gotten down to less than 950 ca

I'm getting bad again.. I've gotten down to less than 950 calories a day.. I'm scared that I'm gonna end up in rehab again but I don't want to be fat. I want to be skinny like I was 2 months ago.. Nobody gets what I'm going through so they just look at me like I'm killing myself right there in from of them.. I can't eat. I look at my food and feel like throwing up..

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hi...
I have never experienced this so I am in no position to say anything or to even try to understand, but i once heard that you can maybe try to pick just 1 aspect of yourself that you absolutely love, ANYTHING, (hair, nails, toes, ears...) and focus on the wonderful thing that you see in yourself. You can see yourself as 99% bad but that 1% is so much stronger than you think. Of course this isnt just a bad day, you have probably had this struggle for a while, but the fact that you are telling people and trying to make an effort says an awful lot about you... whatever is keeping you standing here today is definitely something that can keep you going. Im so sorry you feel this way, getting yourself out of a problem alone is not necesary, there is no shame in help and i hope someone somewhere can see you through your eyes and help you. xx