I'm in tears. How do I cope with an older sister, I've known all my life, who suddenly seems to have some mental illness?
She had an episode about 1 year ago but seemed to have bounced back to normalcy. But now, 1 1/2 years later , her change in behavior is back.
Last time the Psychiatrist said she was just depressed. She's been married for over 15 years. She's very humble, loving, thoughtful, helpful and a very submissive wife.
Four years ago, before her mental illness, she's been suspicious that her husband had been having an affair; to the point where she would follow him at nights sometimes to see where he was going. She even thinks he has a child with another woman, but has no proof. I (as a sister) STRONGLY feel this is what triggered a loss in her sanity. I think she's been doing everything she could do to keep her marriage together.
Many nights her husband would go out and she would be home alone with the girls. She was lonely. And, eventually had an affair. She admitted it to him but that's when the S**T hit the fan. Do you know of those who can give but cannot take? Well, this is when she lost it (literally). She said he was badggering her with questions & not letting her sleep.
I'm new to all of this. Can anyone give me advice on how to cope w/ seeing my sister like this? She & her girls are staying at our house right now. She left her job and said she wanted to come here to 'clear her head' and to rest.
One of the meds I see has been prescribed to her is a med that I know that ppl in a mental institution takes. Risperdal.
It hurts me to see her like this. It's like , it's not even her. She's saying weird things, and doing weird things; putting hair gel on her legs for lotion, spinning around for no reason & jumping up & down for no reason. She looks really tired, like she doesn't really know where she is. I didn't even go to the gym today because I had to take her to her daughter's PTA meeting.
@Bull No, she’s done this before (stay with us). It’s just temporary according to her. Her husband comes to see her & take the kids to school. I honestly think she’s mentally burned out.
I don't know if it's an option but maybe an institution could help her more than you can. I know it's painful to hear but you don't want to wait until she is a harm to herself or others. There may be a lot of triggers around her that are making her loose it. Or she might just be deprived of sleep. How much does she sleep or rest in a day?
@Rewindit She is seeing a doctor privately already. I don’t think she wants to be institutionalized because she doesn’t want anyone to know her mental state. It makes me look at life now …like anything is possible to happen to anyone as long as they’re alive.
It’s just so hurtful and pains me to see that she’s tried so hard to 'keep her family “together” , but in the process , she lost her sanity.
Speaking of triggers, I notice she has a pic of my baby’s funeral. I didn’t even know she got it developed. It’s a pic with my younger sister & my 2 nephews in the cemetery after my baby’s funeral. Don’t know why she has it in an envelope & looking at it. My baby was a baby I never got to bring home. My baby was 3 1/2 months old. This is just one of the strange things my sister is doing.
I'd gently encourage her to see a doc if she isn't already. Beyond that, I'd just suggest trying to help her feel accepted and loved by you like always. It can be scary feeling like you'd changed and that you're not hte person people used to know. Knowing that you're still there for her might be soothing.
@Northguy Thank you for your advice. She’s seeing a private psychiatrist already and she’s currently taking her meds. I think you are right that knowing I’m still there for her might be soothing.
@Rewindit Like I initially said, she is seeing a psychiatrist. He didn’t recommend her being institutionalized. Most likely the doctor saw the best thing for her was to have her with her family, whom she’s familiar with, put her on the meds she needs vs being locked up w/ strangers. The mental institution here doesn’t have the best rep.