I'm Krystal Torres.I'm 18 and about to graduate from High School.It started off with a stupid diet.Well it wasn't stupid, I needed to diet, , and I'm still not overweight.Not yet atleast.
It started with a diet, I was doing great at first, I cut out junkfood and soda and started eating healthy...slowly though, I became very obsessed with my dieting to the point where I'm considered borderline anorexic I believe, now I'm under 5 feet so I shouldn't weigh much in the first place.I'm currently 80lbs.My diet is very restrictive, or was. No meat, cheese, milk chocolate, white breads(oh lord) ect.. I was able to keep this up for a good year and a half...then fast forward as to of the past couple of weeks.I've been having these binging "spells" where usually after a day or a few days of eating my normally clean diet I'll binge on white bread and flour tortillas and cereal out of the box in one go.I'll have like 10 slices of bread, 3 handfuls of cereal and about 6 or 7 tortillas.It doesn't sound THAT bad compared to other bingers, but when you add the calories up plus the other food I ate in the day its near 2000(remember I'm small and don't need that much) these binges at first were pretty distant and spread out, but they've been more frequent, like twice a week lately and I'm so terrified of gaining the weight back..its like I'm possessed and I can't control myself...I think it mostly started when I cut out carbs, like whole wheat bread and tried a diet of purely plant based food and such...I just ate my typical breads and tortillas just now and I feel AWFUL.I'm sorry I know I mentioned calories and weight but it plays a big part with what I'm going through...I just want it to stop :( I want control in my life again.
You know what is worse than the binge eating is when it has to come out the other end especially if it is spicy food.
Haha yeah I guess.Binging on acidic fruit is pretty bad too.A few days ago my entire mouth was bleeding from eating too much raw pineapple in one sitting.
I have been where you are.. I started kind loosing weight at 15 and then got obsessed..it's hard.. I have struggled for 15 years(I'm 30)..and it's went from being super tiny to really fit (obsessed) to now being bigger.. I'm so depressed about it I don't hangout with my friends like I use to.. It's screwed up my metabolism.. And my mind.. I pray that you don't continue down the road I've been.. I would tell you (or my younger self) that being healthy and fit is important but doesn't define who you are..and I know you've heard that before ..I hated and still hate when people say that to me.. But it's true.. And you can stay at the weight you want if you don't starve .... Just workout eat healthy and don't freak out if you eat "too much" once in a while..it's your body telling you it needs those nutrients..and it's actually healthy to have a cheat day.. I also am 5' ..so I get ya.. I'll keep u in my prayers xoxo
Thank you and I'm sorry you're still struggling :/ I can relate on the friends part totally.I'll hide in the bathrooms during lunch/breakfast period to avoid being around the food in the cafeteria, even though it meant being away from my friends, or because I had binged recently and just felt to disgusting to be seen.I feel like everyone knows when I've binged.I try telling myself not to do it because every time I do i go into a deep mental break down.
I guess the best thing for us to do is just learn to forgive and focus on being healthy as you said, its easier said than done but one step at a time I suppose.I wish you luck too.
Thanks ..yes much easier said than done:) xoxo