Its all pretty overwhelming right now. At a point where I don't feel a need to react, but its killing me internally trying to cope with the affects of seeing people in this fearful negative light. I can't feel people's intentions, and it just seems like they want to harm me. Cycling between looking into the eyes of family, friends and loved ones and seeing someone who doesn't seem to care that I am being hurt by all this, and believing I am completely nuts. I'm becoming more and more isolated inside myself just to not react overtly to the pressure, and I'm tempted to pack a bag and just wander off into the night. On meds, they aren't working, and I don't trust the docs either. Feeling like I'm headed down a dark road, and don't know what to do. Trust is gone, and the world I'm living in feels like hell.
Just remember the doctors, while you feel frustrated by them are not the enemy, you have every right to tell them how you are feeling and how you don't feel the meds are working, but if you withdraw from them your ability to heal will slip away.
1 Heart
@CKBlossom Its hard to strike a balance, because in some significant ways they inhibit, or are at least obstacles to my healing. I’ve done cold turkey withdrawal before and I won’t go that route if I can help it.
Is it becuse of trauma? I had felt this way in the past and when I am very stressed out I still feel like others are out to get me.
1 Heart
@Ehelp I think so but it is so hard to tell. Feels very real, and happening all the time all around me.