It's been almost three months since my Narcissist ex moved out. I never knew how freeing it would be ! Yes I miss the good times but I know it was a facade. I hope everyone is doing good.
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Glad you're free!
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@Linda2574 Realize there is no fixing your narc and absolutely NO CONTACT.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder
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Well, not saying every emotional abuser is a narc, but in my case it unfortunately is.
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You lost me there...
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I had never even heard of NPD until i met him. He is textbook.
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@bookworm604
I never heard the term until the final discard. I had self blame, thought if only I didn’t get him mad, didn’t complain. I felt i derserved his punishments. I sought therapy and a support group for abused. I educated myself on narcisstics and it all made sense. I then saw it was not my fault. He will never change. I couldn’t live like that anymore, it was tearing me down emotionally and psychologically.
One thing that helped me was saving an especially cruel text he sent me and whenever I felt weak I would retread it and it would help me remember his true colors.
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@bookworm604
I should have done that as a reminder. There were some pretty harsh and demoralizing words said to me in an email that made me cry for days. I deleted it because it was so very painful to be spoken in such a degrading manner.
I'm soooooo happy for u. Keep moving foreward without him. U r doing great.
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I recorded 30 mins of verbal and physical abuse to help me fight the urge to contact her. Don't worry about what the others think of you. He is conditioning them to continue the abuse towards you. Sooner or later, they will realize what he is and pull away. It's just a matter of time.
Unfortunately, we are just objects for them. They have no empathy and don't see us as anything more than minions or servants.
Mine used to call me his minion. When I would get mad, he would say I couldn't take a joke.
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@Linda2574 How long have you had the anxiety attacks? I was in anxiety hell for 2 weeks. This is week 4 and they are getting better.
Keep praying, but don’t wait. Narcs never see what they have done or lost.
My ex is just waiting for me to go back begging to her when she knows she abused me.
Who doesn't want you on meds? I have one a day and my doctor put me on meds right away.
3 months... I am so sorry you're going through this. I was dying 10 days ago from the anxiety attack (felt like it).
If "They" is your abuser, please ignore them and go to your doctor.
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I hope she is right. 3 months of anxiety attacks several times a day... I couldn't live like this.
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@bookworm60 mine won't move out. it is agony
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@misstolerant I am so sorry. Do you own your home together ? Or if you rent who’s name is the lease in ? I was fortunate that the lease was in my name. Praying for you dear one. I’m here to listen.
I didn't have any good times. I thought I did, but like someone else pointed out...were all fake. I lived a lie for over 7 years. A complete and total lie. I am glad to be free. He pushed me into drinking, when I told him I didn't even like alcohol...I started drinking more, then daily. I spontaneously quit, about two weeks after he left, without even thinking about it. I didn't decide to quit, I just didn't feel the compulsion. He must have had me on edge, really bad. Otherwise, I doubt I would have been able to stop and not even think about it again, if I had a problem with it. I have no inclination at all, and that is so very weird to me, going from one (built-up) extreme to the other like that, in a snap.
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@tabbylady I had not even heard if NPD until I met mine. He was diagnosed before we ever even met. Google armchair helped me too. Also helped me find this site. Tabbylady you are a beacon of light on this site. You are always so sweet and so positive. God bless you.