I've been having really strong thoughts about hurting myself

I've been having really strong thoughts about hurting myself this whole past week. I locked myself in the toilets at work the other day and scratched myself with a staple until i drew blood. It wasn't as satisfying as a proper cut though... I haven't done it yet but I went and found my old blades which I haven't used in months now. The only thing that's stopped me from doing it is that I know my boyfriend will see and get upset. I don't know what to do.

My boyfriend gets upset too. I did it last night and he found me and he's reallllly pissed.

This is the worst feeling. My boyfriend threw mine out.. I say you just talk to him because it will put a strain on your relationship & that will stress you out more