I've enrolled into my high school w/ college electives course recently. I'm studying and getting As, but I feel very depressed. I feel very pathetic that it took me 16 years to come back around to complete my high school. I try to tell myself that I couldn't...I was bed ridded for many years and had severe brain fog. I feel like now that I'm at the point that my health has improved, that it's too late or something. I feel that at 33 its kinda pointless to get my diploma as people have already marked me as a failure. I'm not going to give up though, just feel like I'm just going through the motions. I still do not feel comfortable in my apartment after 6 months of living here. Been trying my therapist suggestions of soft belly breathing and redirecting my thinking. Sometimes it doesn't seem to help much. Feeling like an invisible alien in a world full of normies.
it is amazing how although you feel like there is no point to continuing with your education you have persevered and fought for what you want. You strength, and persistence is amazing.
To: FindingFreedom33 -- First of all, 33 is very young. At one time I even MISTAKENLY thought 50 was too old for new beginnings. So, believe me; you're quite young & have an entire life ahead of you. Be proud of yourself for even going back to complete h.s. That's a MAJOR accomplishment. You have much to be thankful for too; coming thru debilating health issues. Glad you're doing better. I once met & admired a registered nurse who told me she got her nursing degree at age 50. People she knew discouraged her saying ... "You'll be 50 yrs. old by the time you graduate!" BUT, she thought to herself ... It's true, I'll be 50 when I graduate; BUT I'm going to be 50 anyway & might as well have my nursing degree when that happens! I hope everyone reading this draws encouragement from that, because I sure have!! And, going thru/persevering thru the motions of life is better than giving up. Once you stop considering how others MIGHT view you & get busy living like the nurse I met did; I believe you'll start enjoying life more. Do what's best for you ... not what you think others think best. Do what makes you feel good about yourself even if others don't agree and/or understand. As the old Mama's & Papa's song said ... "Make your own kind of music; sing your own special song ... EVEN IF nobody else sings along!" You're ONLY 33 & have soooo many opportunities at hand! I hope you'll see that before it truly is too late. The years fly by quickly ... & time does indeed run out. Also, don't let anyone drag you down & always remember that "the company you keep will determine the life you will live." Surround yourself w/loyal & positive people who will ADD & not subtract from your life experience. And, last but not least; ask God to help you see YOUR way. He's always only a prayer away. You can do it; & we're all rootin' for ya! Each day can be a new beginning, & I hope you have a wonderful one today! p.s. Be thankful for your apartment & fix it up as nice & cheerful as you can to reflect the kind of life you desire & deserve.
@standinginfaith Thanks for those encouraging words. I’m actually trying to do much of what you say. I have thought about that the last week about maybe being 37 or 38 by the time I get my degree, but decided last night that I don’t care. I want to walk on that stage and get my bachelor degree after all I been through.
I said a pray last night to help me, then saw your message this morning. Guess my prayer worked, thanks!