Just heard my evil father talking badly about me. He told th

Just heard my evil father talking badly about me. He told the guy fixing the fire alarm "That one needs to go and get a job. She says she has a masters or whatever". Any chance he has to jab me he will. My father has never once said a good thing to me. He has abused me my entire life and continues to do so. I recently found out through therapy that he is the cause of my self loathing and low self esteem. Apparently because of the experience I have created an "inner critic" which has inhabited me from doing now the most simple tasks which require minimum social interaction. I wish I were normal, I haven't had a job for the past few months just because I feel so low. Feeling like bingeing now. I wish him death honestly.

1 Heart

Having such strong negative feelings about your father must be tortuous. Statements such as the one you've mentioned here art hurtful and unhelpful. Could a life coach be a possible solution for you right now. A good life coach can be an effective support for getting you back on your feet while dealing with some of your confidence and low self-esteem. Hopefully you can take advantage of such personal counseling. HUGS!

@PJcc. What is normal? Your father can well be the cause of your low self esteem, but you are giving him way to much control over you. I think that continue working on you through therapy or live coach as certifiedangus suggested will support a "better you". Your have no control whatsoever on what other people do or say, and about what happened in the past there is absolutely nothing we can do. By changing your demeanor into a more positive one can show him who is in charge. My father used to call me fat in my teen years, he said that he was saying it in an endearing way. There nothing endearing about that. I was devastated. Parents like that are certainly not going to be missed. The very most powerful thing that you can do is re-design your mental wiring with the help of your therapist. It can be done. Good luck.

From Substance Abuse to Mental & Physical Abuse