I am NOT handling this well.....My husband has been very supportive but I not one that will reach out to others but I find myself here!!!
Mom passed 12/28 at the age of 70. It was a total shock to everyone (me, my sister, my father and brother). After 2 weeks Dad (age 76) lands in hospital after a heart attack and has open heart surgery and comes out with flying colors!!!!
After 2 months pass, Grandma is put into hospice age 91 with ending stage demintia and it was about 2 1/2 weeks before she passed.
Out of the blue....dad is in the hospital having problems again with his heart!!! He died 3 days after grandma!!
I am not a church goer, I have some insurance that would help but there is a conflict of interest because my husband works there. I am not doing well I am know it is very fresh in my mind....
sometimes life crashes down around our heads without us quite knowing why it all happened
its amazing how things start to go wrong like dominos falling over
the loss of three people in such a short space of time is a lot to deal with cos u have different levels of guilty thoughts about them mixed up with strong emotions and they all merge into a grey area that is hard to function thru
take one day at a time and do what u can for yourself and allow yourself to grieve for all of them or be angry with them as the need arises during the day
be kind to yourself and let yourself cry scream when u need to its not daft or letting yourself go its called dealing with emotions that need to escape to heal u
aburd, i'm sorry for your losses and pray that you will find ways to cope. yes, i have been through that before. 8 yrs ago I lost my beloved dog on mother's day, july 4th my step-mom died, shortly after my estranged dad had 3 surgeries and almost died (i supported him through my step mom's death and his problems). thanksgiving day my brother died, on memorial day weekend my daughter died. i had not been able to adequately grieve when 2 weeks after her funeral i hemmoraged and had 2 female surgeries, then heart surgery, then bladder surgery. added up the deaths & surgeries happened over a 3 yr period.
was in so much emotional pain and i had nobody to turn to. i thought about jumping off a bridge but soothed myself by eating chocolate every night (became obese). i have no extended family to turn to, my 2 children were 14 and 16 and were not coping with their oldest sister's death (heroin O.D.) well either - had to put one in rehab and send the other away to christian home due to cutting, etc. my husband was a porn freak and it had ruined our marriage so we had no intimacy and could not comfort each other. I think I was trying to kill myself with food.
looking back the healing was a slow process but here's some of the things that helped me. i had a spiritual experience just b4 daughter's death and became very close to God as a result. began soaking up bible studies like a sponge (dr.charles stanley has on online ministry training school that's free and fed my soul). this and prayer (constant pleading prayer for my healing and the welfare of my family, for wisdom as to what to do), bible study with a couple of ladies at work. when my health improved i tried countless times to lose weight, eventually lost 60 lbs. almost back to my beginning weight. had a job during all this but was not good after so many absences.
presently working on improving my marriage. my 2 kids are over problems and in university now, getting good grades. i'm falling asleep at keyboard so will write more tomorrow. one other thing i did was journal which helped a lot. i hoped this helped some. will check on you in a day or two. goodnight! des.