Just signed up for the support group. I have PTSD,Abuse, Anxiety, Sexual Abuse and scizoeffective disorder (Schizophrenia/Bipolar). Last year around this time I lost the love of my life. He was my best friend, supporter, and true love of my life. Now I feel lost and all the past is rushing at me all at one time. I misses him so much...that I can not describe the feeling. At one point I wanted to join him because I did not want to be left in this world. IF someone has understanding then comment.
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Hi...welcome to SG...I hope you find the support you're looking for here...and know you're not alone...we're all here for you...
Thank you for your kind words.
@lost4words Welcome…I lost 9 family members in 1 year. It’s overwhelming and sometimes difficult to explain the experience. I was numb and in a daze for quite a while because it was difficult to grasp and also because while I was grieving, another family member would die unexpectantly. It’s been about three years since it happened and I am doing better yet sometimes if I think too hard or too long, it’s like yesterday. I lost a good friend a couple of months ago and the interesting thing is that whenever someone I know dies, I kinda go back over those that I have lost in the past. So the mourning can become pretty heavy if I am not alert to redirect some of my energy and attention. I read a brochure called “When Someone You Love Dies”. It is written like your best friend is trying to comfort you. It has a list of positive and comforting thoughts that really helped me.
You are strong. You have been through so much and have had so much courage to come here and post. I applaud you and welcome you here. You will find so much support here. I recently joined and it has been so helpful through my journey as I deal with my divorce and grief. I hope you can find all the support you need here.
@AlevArzu Yes… I myself is coping with grief. It has been one year aniversary…which came real hard…I still catch myself being numb as if it did not happen…I experienced seeing death…as my boyfriend took his last breath…He came out the hospital on Saturday and passed away that Monday morning…so fast…I found this site through NIMH…Thanks for your post…
WOW! can I ever relate to your not wanting to be left alone in the world. I feel exactly the same way and am filled at times with incredible anger an rage which I turn on myself in abusive ways. then I stop and ask myself what am I doing? Death is not my fault. but somehow there is that weird little voice that whispers "yes it is" AAAGH I know I have to work through this and that as my therapist says be kind and gentle to yourself. Hmmmmph we'll see.
@PeniMartel …I feel left alone…however…I do have my kids and grandkids…yet in still I feel that void and numbness that I can not explain…I am trying my best to overcome this…however…I am seeing my therapist and psyciatrist on a weekly basis…I only take one day at a time and hope for the best…Be strong…I am going to try…Take Care…
A moderator on this website mentioned a book by Lynn Grabhorn called "Excuse me, Your Life is Waiting" I bought it the next day because I will do anything to shake off the void and numbness you speak of. It is difficult for me to wrap my mind around the ideas but I am trying and yesterday, ( the day from hell) I worked on the challenges using her suggestions. I went to bed feeling lighter, somewhat happy, and I am blown away because I honestly felt I would never feel those feelings again. If you are interested, read the review on Amazon and on Banyen Books in Vancouver BC Canada. Bless that moderator for the support.
Thanks for the really good information...Yes...I try to redirect my thoughts and then something else would come up and remind me of him..then I would have to cope with that and then my health is not too good and that just adds to the fire...however..I definetley would like see that book...Thanks very much for trying to get the brochure for me...In the meantime I will try to redirect my attention and find something to interest me more....
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