Last night my spouse an I were about to be intimant when I nLast night my spouse an I were about to be intimant when I

Last night my spouse an I were about to be intimant when I noticed what looked like a cold sore on his pale parts. We went to the doctor and just left... The doctor says it looks like herpes, prescribed my spouse medicine and we are to go back for testing. This would be his first outbreak and I have never had one that I was aware of. I have read up what Google has thrown at me but yet I still keep asking myself (and him) if he has cheated, we have been together 3 years, have a one year old and have never had an outbreak. I am certain I slept with someone about 5 years ago who does have genital heroes which I found out afterwords. Can someone help me. We have a trusting relationship, I don't really believe he has cheated but yet why would nether of us ever have an outbreak before?

Now after reading other people's comments I wonder if I was checked during pregnancy???

Probably were. Herpes is not something that Dr test for unless you already have lesions. I've asked for a full STD test and the Dr still didn't give me a Herpes test. The medical community doesn't think there is a benefit to knowing you have Herpes unless you have symptoms.

@Runningwithlife so they don’t do blood test? I’m reading so many different things. Some country’s they do but not in the US (where I’m from). So could we of had it an just never known?

Either of you could have had it prior. If you got tested when pregnant and was negative you would assume hes cheated. Unless you have been tested before hand its hard to know. You can be assymptomatic for years by the way. Will you get tested now? Only you know whether he is being faithful or not

@lisajd I’m going to call tomorrow morning an find out if I was tested our not during pregnancy. I’m going to get tested but what I don’t get is say I’m negative and he didn’t cheat how have I not got it by now?

If you dont have it. Your pretty lucky plus if he has had it for years i think the risk of transmission is reduced. Has he been under stress or unwell. This can bring on symptoms.

@lisajd so I could not have it and he has had it for years? Super stressed we moved 3 times in 3 months with a baby before getting into our house we are trying to buy. Now he has me wondering if he has been faithful.

There are many scenarios so get tested first or find out if you were tested when pregnant. Did he get blood tests or swab?

@lisajd both I thought but now I’m not sure. Can you tell how long you have had it through blood test?

I believe blood tests can tell you how long its for but im not too up to speed with that side of it. If you go get tested you could ask your doctor about that. As I said, the virus can lay dormant for many years. If someone has a strong immune system it may never even surface. ive seen many posts on here where a monogamous couple married for 8 years, one of them finds out they have herpes. even myself, I have no idea how long I had it for. my symptoms lead to a one night stand but he says he is clean, then my ex boyfriend from 4 years ago tells me his ex wife had it and how he is clean. What is important for you is to know if you have it or not and whether he has been faithful or not and only you can work that one out.