Last week I spent 4 days out of town at a work conference with 3 of my co-workers (who actually happened to be my supervisor, my manager and the assistant director...talk about pressure!!). I live alone and really value my space and privacy and alone time so it was a real challenge to spend 24 hours a day for 4 days with 3 other people. Even when I tried to slip away to spend some time on my own at the hotel gym one of them tagged along. I was able to keep my cool, but the biggest challenge was that for 4 days I had no control at all over what/where I ate. At the conference meals were provided and in our off time the assistant director selected what restaurant we would eat at because she was the one with the company credit card. All week I felt anxious about having no say in my diet and extremely self conscious about eating every meal with other people (I can handle the occasional meal out with people but for the most part I am uncomfortable eating with/in front of others). All week I felt disgusting and was sure that I was just packing on the pounds and destroying all the hard work I have done all month. I just weighed myself (Sunday AM is my regular weigh in time) and I actually lost half a pound rather than gained, but I still feel so badly about the week. Part of my recovery is to eat often (3 balanced meals and 3 healthy snacks a day) and to eat regularly (approx every 2 - 3 hours) but all week I had to wait to eat until everyone else was ready and I felt uncomfortable eating my regular snacks because I didn't want to be the only one eating. I guess it wasn't until this past week that I realized that my binge eating has a lot to do with that element of having control over something. I have been doing good in my recovery and am now about 2 1/2 weeks binge free (a personal record) but this past week almost pushed me over the edge again.
Sometimes, when things change and are out of our control, it is hard to keep the same schedule that we can maintain at home, you have will and determination to take care of yourself, and that is very important. God bless you.