loneliness, tired of the same old stuff. Every day I try to keep my chin up and not stumble and fall which I seem to be good at. Looking for another partner to share my life with is sure harder the older I get. Things are not looking much better can't leave home to look for anyone else. Don't know if I want another one to take care of. This makes widow 2xs for me and I feel like this is the end of the road for me. I have taken care of two men while they died and the strain on me for my own health is a real problem. Have no family to be close with. My children are estranged from me so I spend my evenings alone and caring for my animals. That is a full time job. I seem to have no more plans to do things or get better. No plans to go anywhere which I should but I unfortuanately can't. Had hired help at one time but I fired them after I lost my second significant other. He made my life and theirs miserable. I do lots of reading and watch tons of youtube videos. I have joined so many groups that I think that all of you think I might be crazy. I had made plans for my step son to come to live with me but he let drugs take him away from that idea. His sex addiction was out of control as well. Didn't need to go through all of that stuff I am too old to be trying to compete with any younger people. Just plain lonely now. I took a fall last month that sent me to the ER and left a scar on my face now I get to live with. I fell into some corrigated steel panels and broke two bones in my face. Of course no one was here so I drove myself to the ER. Now I have that to tend with not knowing what it will cause me to have problems down the road. Just wish I had someone to share this crazy life with. I raise dogs and have stayed home for many years. Just not able to plan ahead for anything. It all is over. Seems like I cannot sleep at night it will be 2 or 3 in the morning before I get to bed. Just having a friend would help so much but no one wants to be around a person that is not a good person. That is what my daughter told me. I was not a very good person. What did I ever do to her. Kids are gone and that way they don't share my grand kids with me. Wish I was somewhere else in life. I wish I could put a bucket list up of people I would love to see suffer. I stay home all the time except for grocery shopping. I found amazon is great to mail order anything you want. Wish I had a friend......
I'm here for you as a friend. I've supported you, and if you support me back we can chat. I'm bad at replies. But will surely try my best. I hope it makes feel a little better. Have a nice day
Hello grace how are you feeling today I kind of understand where you are coming from I too am alone and I hate it I can't seem to find anyone to talk with or even get in a relationship with some one I feel as a cancer survivor no one wants me because what the chemo and radiation had done to me. Heck by the age of 30 I had to have a heart transplant because of the chemo and radiation I got as a child from the cancer but I would like to talk with you I don't have any friends my self so if you would like we can be friends I will support you and if you support me we can chat with each other hope to hear from you
I am ever so sorry to hear about the cancer you have fought against. I know when my husband had stage 4 lung cancer they said we would have at least one year but it turned into just four months after all the kemo and radiatiuon. His daughters told everyone I killed him and life has not been good in so long. I got together with my significanto other and took care of him for 5 years of that relationship. He tore me up so bad I still real from the abuse that I took from him. He had COPD, heart failure, and hernia issues and on and on. I lived with him for 15 years tolal. He died a year ago May of 2022. I have had to deal with all the people that where left working here that proseeded to rip me off. It got so bad I fired them all and did it myself. It worked for about 6 weeks but finally I found a couple to move onto the ranch to help and then another single lady. It has been really rough as my kids are estranged from me totally and they even now do terrible things to me and say bad things. I have lived here for 40 years without them doing a thing to help me to continue on. I have not started to date anyone even as I am much better off alone. I raise dogs for a living so the chance of anyone wanting to be around me had better love animals. I have always had the love for my animals in the front of my life./ I give myself and time to them and try to save as many of my puppies that I can. I have always been a very up front person that pulls no punches and tell it like it is. No games here. I don't want to be scammed and I am looking for a partner not a romantic relationship. MY
@graceex what kind of dogs do you have I have a pit she’s getting old I already know it will be rough on me when I have to put her down I have had her since she was 12 weeks old and that was in 2010 of course I have her spoiled rotting but rhats fine for me lol she’s my baby I still treat her like a puppy sometimes and she even acts like one still I myself are looking for friends and like you I don’t want to be scammed how old are your kids
I know it has been sometime since you wrote. I try not to get woundup in my own sadness. Seems like people just really do not understand about things. I work on my self daily but it seems like I never can get ahead. Being a dog breeder is so hard. People that write about us really do not have a clue as to what that job entails. Life and death is a real situation that you have to face daily. I love my animals far more than people. I don’t mean to be short on writing but I just cannot express myself very well here. If you want to email me I don’t know how to do that this way. God bless and I hope your dog is still with you. Grace
hi friend, I want you to know it’s best to stay in the moment. you are doing good trust me ,later your kids will fall into the right path. That’s life it’s a face. well I’m available to chat if you care for us to be friends.
What are you willing to do to stop suffering?