Lonely and Sad

I am new here and not really sure what I should be writing. I can put my feelings into words in my own head let alone online. I am divorced, in my mid-40s, and my last relationship ended about two years ago. I have been fine up until now. I have a great family, great kids and a new grandchild. I just recently ended a 30 year friendship with my best friend and I had to for my own mental health. She is the constant victim and it reached a boiling point the last few months. She is married to a family member so although our friendship ended she wont be out of my life completely. Being the 'victim' she has said horrible things about me to people I have known for a long time. I am just really hurt. I realize now how nice it would be to have someone to talk to about my feelings. I relocated about 5 years ago and aside from people I know at work and friends of friends, I really don't know a lot of people. Those that I do know are married and those that are divorced are quite a bit older then me. I don't even know where to meet people in this town! I feel like I am going to be alone forever. Between the loneliness and the friendship ending I am so anxious. I don't sleep well and it is affecting everything in my life. I feel like I cant be happy but I'm sure it just because I am in a type of mourning from the loss of my friendship and the realization that I am alone. It has to get better......

i am sorry you are feeling lonely, i am sure being divorced and ending a friendship is probably a shock to the system and a big change in lifestyle. Just take it one day at a time. Talk to the friends of friends that you know and invite them out to coffee, lunch, or something to get to know them. Or have a small dinner party to invite people over.

I acutally just wrote up a post in the lonliness section with some tips on how to make friends because that is a big topic here. check it out.

Give it time and you will get there and it will get better.

Hey you always have us to write too! Congrats on your new grand baby, how about a new hobby? Dance lessons????????

NewYorkGirl, I too had to end a 42yr. relationship w/my friend, felt awful & as you described I had to do it for my own emotional well being, it still hurts, so my thoughts are w/you. Victoria offered you good advice & please go easy on yourself. When & if its your thing try out crzy18tee suggestion too.

I'm a grandma too, he just turned 1 so congrats on your wonderful grandbaby it'll open a whole new door.

Take care of you.

April

Boy I know that alone forever feeling. You will have friends here. Im lucky to be with friends. You will make new friends.Church is an excellent way to meet people. Volunteer somewhere for something. Join a club. Fitness club. Ive relocated to new places far from friends and family and I know how u feel. Hang in there. Lots of love from California. gypsy

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. It is exactly what I needed! I will try to get more involved and find a hobby once I am out of this funk. I think I just need some time to absorb the changes in my life. Luckily the holidays are approaching and I am expecting visits from family which I am looking forward to. My grandson is definitely the light of my life. Thank you, thank you, thank you! It is so nice knowing that I am not as alone as I feel :)

Here you can be safe and feel free to write as you like. It is kind of funny how things pan out, us being here and getting along as well as we do. I wish it could be like this in society. Don’t let people get you down, they love to kick you when they think you can’t get up. We are here and are all in need of understanding. Don’t give her the power and go on as you are.We can get through it.

Loosing relationships can take a while to get used to. As far as meeting people, Meetup.com has groups with a lot of different intests. You don't have to commit to doing a particular thing reeatedly so it can be a good way to try out new things to do.