I am a contradiction of myself. I want friends so badly and will stop what I am doing to listen to whatever someone else has to say, but I cannot start conversations and try my best to stay out of everyone’s way, because of thinking that I an nothing but an inconvenience to everyone else. So, I am invisible in the social world, but I so badly want someone to befriend me enough to ask how I am sometimes, so that I can feel that someone cares whether I live or die. Pathetic, is it not?
1 Heart
how old are you?
because that is something you could possibly outgrow
I am 46, born in 1978. I am sorry to have bothered you. This is why I do not say much, to avoid embarrassing myself or annoying someone else.
Hi, who said you have annoyed or bothered someone else? Why are you embarrassed?
You’ll feel that it’s pathetic. From the outside, having read this post, I can tell you that pathetic is not what this is, or what you are. I am severely lonely and I am not pathetic…just a lonely person. Friends have forgotten how to be friends and family have forgotten how to be family. We know that we’re great at being loyal friends, but feel that nobody else knows how to match our high standards of attention and loyalty, and we suffer when we fail to find people who do/can. One thing is certain…what you feel about yourself will come to an end. No matter how far down life takes us, we always come back up, again.
1 Heart
I think something everyone needs to learn is that we will bother people, we might be inconvenient and THAT IS OK. We fear people too much when in reality people should be more open about what is annoying to them. You have to think about yourself too, you cant live your life in fear what others will say all the time cuz people will say whatever they want and think whatever they will think, i know its hard, im saying this but i care about what others think too and i try too avoid that but its hard. Your life is only yours to live, when you stop yourself from doing things the only one getting hurt from it is you. Youve been alive for long enough to know people dont really care about things and if they care they should tell you, otherwise there is nothing you can do about it. Have you always been like that? We care if you live or die, thats what a support group is for, take care and i hope i helped a bit.