Tired of life trying to find some reason to be happy again. My health is worse now and controlling my life. Can’t rely on the health service here . I get no support or help from anyone. Can’t do some activities because of my health , Going 1 day to the next just surviving existing.
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I think a lot of people here can probably relate to this post. I mean granted none of us have lived your individual life or have struggled in the same way you have/are; but all of us do struggle in some way or another–otherwise google wouldn’t have dropped us here. Lol, misery really does love company you know.
I think about the difference between existence and actually living often and I know that the life I am currently living isn’t really “living” at all. Its just me existing because I struggle with so many personal issues that I somehow manage to keep putting life off; and yet when I do actually feel brave enough to try something or take a chance somehow it always seems to backfire on me and all my issues just get that much more reinforced.
I watch people all the time take risks and really live their lives, but I have just never been that person. I always play it safe, and a lot of the time that is just me wallowing in my own mess of fear misery in a quiet, lonely, kind of pathetic existence these days.
I just want you to know that you aren’t alone. It is a rough world to live in and most everything seems to lean more towards “scam” these days. Your life sounds rough and I am sorry that so many people have kind of let you down. Hopefully, something will break for you soon and you will find at least something that brings you a little joy.
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I feel very similar Sasha. Its hard feeling like this. I have to ignore health problems to make sure I have enough to just pay for the necessities. My back has me in extreme pain but I just have to bare it and it makes life hard. When you already don’t feel good mentally and you have to worry about your health too its overwhelming.
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i also struglle to be happy:(
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Hi there! I know how you feel sort of, coz Im not you and your experiences are unique to your life. Ive had similar experiences. If you still around maybe we can correspond or eventually hang out together and make life more bearable. Not sure how to do that on here. Im all on my own at the moment lost my mum, my friends and my boyfriend and dont trust my family or many people anymore. But I want to do something about it are you with me? Im a thirty something year old woman in London.
You already have happiness, just like everybody else has. You just can’t experience it because of the suffering that is suffocating it, a state that almost everybody else has.
Happiness is not the presence of something that changes your state of mind. Its the exact opposite. Happiness is the absence of something and that something is suffering.
Happiness cannot be found by anything outside of your mind.
The good news (some will argue that it is not) is that each person who suffers has created their own suffering - it is an impossibility for suffering to happen by the words or acts of others or because of the various circumstances that can occur to a person.
And just as you have created your own suffering, you can end it all too. And you are the only one who can do that for yourself.
I suffered for over 35 years, going through the motions of living but without knowing why. I hated life and everything in it and I had a username on another forum, which was SSDD (same shit different day). My ideal outcome was that I would die, be born again into a different body, as a different person, somewhere different to where I was at the time. This was my “life” for years and years and years and years. I could write a book on what I went through but I won’t.
I was alone, had no job, no money, no family and no friends (but I really didn’t want any). I mostly just sat at home all the time, doing nothing really, just fiddling around on web sites. One day, I just decided that the system wasn’t going to help me and that I had to do something myself, for myself.
I discovered the above knowledge and great many more things, when I started to search for a solution.
Over a period of about 5 months, I learned so many things from a lot of different people online, through videos and articles, things which no-one had ever told me before.
I was able to see that I was not ill or sick and nor have I ever been, that there was nothing wrong with me, or wrong with life and that the cause of my protracted suffering was to do with the thoughts I had, thoughts which I had given attention to and believed to be true.
I see a lot of posts on this site from people who are calling out for help. But what such people need to understand is that no-one else can end their suffering for them. Yes, other people can provide resources and suggestions but that is all really.
I also understand that not everyone is in a position to take action right now, so debilitated are they by their suffering - believe me I know. Many days I never left my bed.
I only post to provide knowledge that may help and also, to tell you and other people that suffering is 100% a choice and 100% unnecessary.
Suffering and being physical unwell are not the same thing, although many people conflate these two things.
Hey, Sasha … When I read your post I could hear myself talking. I feel pretty much the same way. This is the reason I am here. I believe I am a survivor, I will get out of this, but I need a little help from my (new) friends. I am pleased to know you. Have a great weekend! John