My brother Molested me and my sister when we were kids . I told my mom and she did nothing so I automatically went and told my counseling at school they called my mom and then my brother pick up went back to the Navy cause he was just on a visit. my mother hated me for bringing what he did to light . my sister was molested for many year more then me she never admits it I actually walked in on an incident and she still denies it . I don’t get it? I don’t understand why she does that and if I talk to her she makes me feel like a liar my sister never wants to admit it to this day my sister denied it ever happened.. omg it happened to her for many years more than me !! I don’t understand..she actually gets along with him today she with him all the time . He is a RN nurse and makes a lot of money and successful and doesn’t seem like he isn’t happy at all with what he did and I struggle every day with so many issues I do not speak to him he actually hates me and my family definitely turns on me for exposing him .my mother died on her death bed she apologized . but still she never cared that he did what he did to me ..I live every day at the age of 55 unsafe unsure of people full of anxiety and depression.. I know in my heart what happen even if no one else believes me.
I’m glad I just shared that. Cause it bothers me still.
I’m sorry your whole family makes you feel that never happened n don’t believe. I think possibly your sister could’ve completely blocked the trauma that occurred to her. Some people will literally erase from memory what happened. It could also be that she saw how your mother reacted to you n she feels like there’s no reason in admitting it if people will turn on her. That’s hurtful though that they won’t accept. Nobody ever acknowledged my abuse going on when I was kid either. I just decided it’s because my family don’t want to deal with it. The anger being projected onto victim is too common of an occurrence. It should not happen. Has anything helped you get over this like counseling or keeping journal? I hope you feel much better about this!
I can imagine How broken you are right now.
the biggest pains are the ones inflicted by our loved ones.
I'M glad you had the strength to share this here.
I for one admire your courage dear friend.
Let the hope of life give you the strength to carry on
If you ever need anyhow to talk to I'm. right here for you.
Please stay strong.
you can private chat me anytime.
@kelvinwayne1234… thank u so much
That's a horrible, horrible situation, and I think it's commendable on your part that you had the strength and courage to bring that situation to light. This sounds very similar to the Jon Benet Ramsey case that occurred in the 1990's. I watched some documentaries and interviews about that, and there's a theory floating around that her brother was the person who raped her and killed her, and that theory proposes that her parents covered it up by making up a story that a mystery assailant did the deed, while hiding the evidence that pointed back to her brother. One of the shows that I watched proposed that theory by stating it made sense because if the brother was accused of the crime, he would go to juvenile hall, possibly be convicted as a felon, so the family would lose the son and the daughter, and since the daughter was already dead, they wanted to keep their only remaining child safe and in their custody. In other words, they forfeit justice for the greater good of keeping their remaining family together.
Much like the Ramsey's, perhaps, your mom tried to cover up everything and look the other way for the greater good of keeping her family together, and protecting the family's reputation from the media, persecution, and public ridicule. Perhaps, your sister shrugged it off as being a bad dream or nightmare for the greater good of knowing that if she squealed, she would lose her brother who would go to prison and who would hate both of his sisters for telling on him, and also protecting the family's reputation from the media, persecution, and public ridicule. Maybe, she put it behind her, knowing that it's all in the past, and that as the times change, people change too.
It's kind of like dealing with politics in that people believe what they want to hear, but censor or ignore the stuff they don't like, instead of facing reality and acknowledging the truth.
Hello Pauline 1234, deeply sorry that you and your sister suffered being molested by your brother earlier in your lives - and that when you told your mother that she did nothing but deny it and ended up blaming you for reporting to a school counselor. There is nothing that can be done now, but had the counselor reported your brother - the judge advocate offices would have had to have done an investigation before he [your brother] was allowed to return to his duty station/status. However Pauline 1234, that time has passed and you have to deal with the results of being molested by your brother - just remember that YOU were and are the victim. Your brother had no right to cross those lines and it is not your fault, but his fault. The fact that your mother turned a blind eye to the abuse, but on her dying bed she apologized for her ignoring and allowing it to happen to you and your sister - she knew and did nothing - that's not how a mother protects her daughters or children. I agree with Found Love, regarding your sister's denying anything ever happened to her or you. She has compartmentalize the abuse so well to protect herself from the painful memories of the incestuous events and incidents [even if you walked in on them]. You could probably have all the evidence in the world, and your sister wouldn't believe you, because in her mind - it never happened. You should focus on yourself now - find a therapist, and allow yourself to chance to live a healthier life of yourself without having to fear the past. The world outside may never believe you. but you know the truth and people here believe you. And your brother will find that karma will find him at some point for his actions. You are believed - and it is your time to learn to live for yourself and no one else. Take care. One Day At A Time.
@JustJ60 thank u
It could be that her denying it is a was of coping or repressing it. Disassociating from it so she can survive. You are very strong for wanting to face it. She would be fortunate to have the strength like you!
@sandfalls…. Thank u