My husband is back in rehab for a 3rd time in 7 months. I've

My husband is back in rehab for a 3rd time in 7 months. I've been through it before but somehow this time I feel more and more scared that the only way it'll stop is that he'll overdose and die. It's like I feel it's going to happen soon. I know it probably sounds stupid that I feel it happening soon. But it has never felt so real before that he can just die. I mean this time he just drove around looking for it (used to be thru ppl he knew) and the guy could have easily robbed him, shot him, gave him a "bad batch." I don't know what I'd ever do if I truly lost him. I hate not having control. I hate that I can't rescue him. I've never touched a drug and they're killing me. I love him so much, I just want to save him :( thanks for letting me vent.

5 Hearts

I'm going through the same thing with my fiancé. It is hard knowing that you can't save him and the only way he's gonna get the help is if he wants it. If you need anything don't hesitate to message me

Thank you. I'm sorry your fiance has this same struggle. It's so hard to be the one who has to sit back and wait. And watch them continue to succeed then slip, succeed then fail. I wish it was curable. I hate living my life constantly worrying if he can stay clean. Or if something will go stolen, or he'll be missing. It's like we'll never have peace of mind, you know? Unless we leave. But I honestly and truly don't want to go. Where are you at in the leave/stay area, if you don't mind me asking?

1 Heart

@erbear521 I truly wanna stay and spend the rest of my life with him. I wish it was curable too the rehab might work and he might never use again but it will always be in the back of mind and if things go missing the first thing that will come to mind will be did he trade it for drugs or drug money.

I pray for your husband. This is his second time in rehab he went a couple years ago before we had met and he had just recently started up again right before we got together he has stopped a couple times cold turkey but always ends up going back so it's been probably something he's been fighting with for about 6ish years give or take some. I think part of it is some of the people he hangs around with dont want him to become clean and some of them are friends he's been friends with for years which makes it really hard on the both of us

@Kelsey47 and I know how you feel I don’t know how much more I can take either I pray that this works because it tears me down

Exactly and I called everything off and he than said he had a problem and was gonna go get better so we could have a life together and have the family we both want but I don't know if he's serious or if he just said it because he knew that's what I wanted to hear and that's what worries me the most

@Kelsey47 I know in the deepest place in my heart that my husband wants to be free of his addiction. He wants to stop screwing life up for us. So I believe him when he says he wants to be different, wants to change. I believe your fiance. That he doesn’t want to be an addict. That he wants to be the person you deserve. It’s just so hard for them to make it a reality. Of course they have to do it for themselves first, which is a hard thing for me to take sometimes because I feel I’m important too, but it’s the truth. He has to honest and truly work to change. They all do. Addicts think that one hit or whatever will be enough to satisfy them, that they can do it just one more time and still be good but isn’t like that at all. It’s not the same, but I compare it to me and eating hershey kisses. I tell myself I can eat one measly hershey kiss but then I go through six. Anyway, I do believe he wants nothing more than to be a “normal” and clean person for you. It’s just hard when their actions speak differently. I really hope you and I and our men are success stories one day.

He died :( and I don't want to live anymore.

@erbear521 I am so sorry :frowning: Please reach out if you need support. We are here for you!

I'm really sorry for your loss

Thank you. I know how you feel, it's an ever present fear and I hate how much control we don't have :( I hope your daughter becomes a success story. I don't want anyone else to have to lose someone.

You and my husband are in the same boat. I'm The one addicted to heroin and my husband is the one that's never touched a drug. He is my biggest supporter but at the same time the drug does seem to have a hold on me and make me put my family last in most cases . Just wanting to say that on behalf of a drug user I am sorry for what we put the good people in our lives through.

1 Heart

@Kimbella you are good person as well, just struggling with a addiction. I pray you enter treatment and start living life free from drugs, heroins grip is strong but you can get out of it. I believe in you and your husband does the most. Take care