My husband says that the last time he was active in this aff

My husband says that the last time he was active in this affair was a year ago but in a weird way I don't believe him. I know I won't find the answer from him which makes me want to ask the chick, but I don't know her and I don't know if I want to her. Plus I don't know how important this question is.... I feel stuck. Its like I want to know but I don't, but I feel like I should but what good would it do for me. I'm so confused.

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Every decision becomes so confusing. I know exactly what u mean. I have only ever hear horror stories when someone decides to contact the other person. I think it's a bad idea- she doesn't have ur best interest at heart. She had her best interest at heart. And likely she feels destain for u and ur husband (for leaving her) and would want to hurt u. No good will come. As far as wanting to know the exact details of the timeline- maybe get him into therapy. Counseling. Have long discussions. Read books together. If it's important to u that u know this- and can't let it go- then create a safe environment for him to open up to u. Best of luck. Sorry u r here

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@jdimples005 I empathized with what you're going through, but do you really want to contact the other woman....What are you going to ask her ? Are you still sleeping with my husband?or When was the last time you slept with him? Was it a year ago? He told me that it was? .... I am sorry, but doesn't it sound all wrong, to be asking these questions? ... Supposed she's a bit**, and is horrid to you, can you believed a word, she says? ! It's either you trust your husband, or not.... His track record, isn't good lately? .....There's no good, done, by contacting the other woman.....
Yes, at the end of the day Trust, and Respect are the foundation of a marriage, when it's shattered by Infidelity, it's difficult to get it back..... But we've some success stories here, on SG. You can mended, and heal after one's spouse or partner's cheating. But it takes 2, to work at ithe relationship.....You needed to both go to marriage's counselling. As you posted, you feel stuck, it's liked you want to know, but you don't, of your husband's infidelity, and the OW... But you feel liked you should, but what good would it do? .... You are confused... You are going to be confused for awhile....But .In the long run, you will gained Strength! My thoughts, and prayers are with you. SG friends are here, to support, and be supported.

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Trust me, the OW will not tell you anything resembling the truth. Remember, she is a person with little to no morals who sleeps with married men. Why do you think she will become honorable now? If you think about it, she would no doubt love to know the pain she has caused and no doubt will take that opportunity to get back in touch with your husband. The only conversation you should be having about his affair, is with him and maybe a counselor if you are seeing one. Please take it from someone whos been there, done that.

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I also would not recommend talking to the OW. I did, and it just gave me a whole new batch of things to torture myself with and learn to get over. Yeesh! I really didn't need more stuff to play over and over again in my head. If you are going to stay in your marriage you have to try and rebuild trust somewhere. If you feel he is still lying, why would you want to stay?

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Thank you so much for responding. I feel so much better about the question. I am not going to pursue her or ask her question. You guys are right, what is she suppose to tell me the truth? I need to focus on working on my marriage because I decided to try and forgive him and give him another chance. Its just so tough. I have really really good days and then I have one bad day and it feels like more than one. I guess it doesn't matter when was the last time but the fact that he actually did it. This all hurts so much, I hate that he did this to me.

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