My narc did me a favour by leaving. It's over a year now and

My narc did me a favour by leaving. It's over a year now and the fog has been lifting, and I'm starting to see feel and live again. Only today, this morning, I realized, looking back, it was a seething ever present anger misting from the narc that kept me in the fog. This anger I've seen in people I suspect are narcs. I think normal people can sense this anger and stay away from the fog machine; we co-dependents try to cool the anger and get sucked into the steaming lava pit.
It's anger. There's an ever present anger projection into the environment by the narc. My home was always angry. A seething anger that maligns family and friends, and pollutes the environment. I started doing something I never used to do, burn incense in the house. And Jerusalem candles. What the heck? Subconsciously this might have been trying to figuratively rid the house of the vulgar narc anger. The anger was ever-present, so much so, that I became conditioned to it, and din't see or feel it consciously anymore. But it was there. That's one of their black-magic tricks and a constant in all narcs. I remember walking into the living room and looking at her, and thinking, "What am I seeing? What am I feeling from her looking at her?" I couldn't get it then, now I do, IT WAS ANGER.

1 Heart

As a child of a co-dependent and a Narc, I can definitely say that for us, Anger from both of them was a power play, it was a constant tug of war of power that kept their relationship going for 30 years and then it imploded! I totally agree with your post and happy 1 year of freedom!

@CKarma
Wow sounds like me and narc uggh can’t wait to let go of the rope and be done with the war