Need help

Ive had a gambling problem for 4 years now and it is eating me up inside. Today is the day I decided to end this misery for good. I am hurting my wife and myself. Ive found myself down a whole days’ pay two hours after leaving work. Ive gone almost a year overdrawing my bank account every 2 weeks. Thankfully, my wife has been patient with me, but we have goals and we will never achieve them if I dont find a way to stop. Sooner or later, that patience will end, and I couldnt fault her for it. We have tried some preventative measures such as her holding the money and bank cards, but Ive found ways to go around the self-imposed blockades. Today she gave me $60 to deposit in the bank to cover a wedding gift and $15 spending cash for the day. Within 3 hours I had gambled it all away. I have no idea of what to say because the upfront approach has now worn thin. I think the genesis of my problem 4 years ago was the need to save quickly and winning $1000 on a birthday gift scratch ticket. This was before I met my wife and I was trying to save for a better place to live and to go to school again. My compulsion died down for awhile when I was doing better financially for about a year. Then, times got tough again and I started right back up. I met my wife when times were toughest and I was head-long into gambling. Then, as my wife went overseas for a spell I tried saving for a trip to see her. Saving was going to take too long so my compulsion grew worse. Finally she returned home and we decided not to be apart any longer and were married. We have made plans to travel abroad to visit her family and I am crushing them. About 6 months ago, I came clean and told her about this problem. We are both obviously very nervous for the future. Please help, I dont know which way to proceed. Im not sure if GA will be helpful. I feel as though this is just another phase of my life-long journey of self-destruction. I used to drink alot but not so much anymore. I have been a chronic under-achiever. Ive been stuck in a dead-end job for 8 years now because of the security it provides me. The more I look at it, the more I see it as a symptom of depression. How have others overcome this without having to leave their jobs, families, etc.? Does hypnosis work? Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with a psychiatrist? I appreciate any feedback.

Yes, support group meetings do work. I've be clean for almost 4 weeks. I will keep my date and I refuse to let the evils of gambling smother me again. Trust me, go to the nearest GA support group meeting ASAP! You need to feel better about yourself. I'll email you again tomorrow.

Thanks Mary, so far so good. I am going to speak to a family member and come clean. This family member works with compulsive gamblers and I am sure she will be shocked to know. Even now I came back here because maybe the thought of venturing out 10 bucks this morning for a little fun is bouncing around in my head. GA meetings are scarce in my area but I did find 2. Maybe I will give them a shot. As for now, writing here hopefully is the 'delay' that I will use to kill the urge. Thanks for responding and congrats on your sober time!

TEWKS: I decided to change my name to recruiter mjs because my mission is to help as many as possible STOP gambling all together. No bets on ANYTHING! I find this support group site beneficial to relaying my feelings on the subject in hopes of helping others over come the strong-hold of compulsive gambling. I missed my last local GA meeting due to transportation problems which are fixed now. I attend on Friday evenings at 5:30 and I so enjoy listening to others in the group share their experiences during the past week. We all take it one day at a time. We enjoy visiting with each other too. Other members get so excited to see me and it appears that if I miss a meeting, they tell me when they see me at the following meeting how much they missed my being there. I’m happy to have such an impact on others. The love of God is very powerful! Share the love and find your GA group meeting nearest to your home.

The first thing you need to do is quit making excuses , go to the first GA meeting you can get to ,get yourself a sponser ,and start listening, And your life WILL get better and quickly! MONEY is the least of your problems you have a whole world of problems you descrbed yourself that you havent even begun to deal with. Remember trying to recover from a gambling addiction takes a life time Take it one minute ,one hour ,one day at a time, and work at the whole process at the same time and think about how much better your life will be when you can wake up and be in trouble for not taking the garbage out NOT for losing the mortgage :) Belive me I was there :) the last 4 years have been the best of my life... Hope this helps some Steve

Thank you SteverR for the tough love. Sometimes this is exactly what is necessary to get the attention of a compulsive gambler. You are right about making excuses. That is a problem that all gamblers have, then it becomes one lie after another to our spouses or significant others until we become all tangled up in the wicked web of lies. Life is too short to lie about flushing money down the casino toilets all over the world. The casinos are benefiting from the stupidity of compulsive gamblers. Of course, they love seeing you sad,broke, down and out looking stupid as you leave their premises. Fight back and stay away! This is the best way to defeat those money hungry theives.