Hi. I am new here. I have had an ED for 10 years now. I am only 22 and my ED has already ruined my life. I am about to graduate college and am terrified of leaving my school and sorority. I had to take a year off from college to go to inpatient treatment so me graduating is an accomplishment. I am so scared to leave my support system (my sorority). I was doing well until recently. I am dealing with the grief of leaving and the uncertainty of what graduation brings. I have a therapist but my last session made me fall deeper into my ED. I was having a very awful day and was very depressed. My therapist was going over things that I could do to feel better when she had to leave to attend to another student because they were having an emergency. Her leaving brought up my abandonment issues and I had a full panic attack after I had to leave. That was about almost a week ago and I have been struggling every since. I really need support and there aren't any support groups any where near me.
wishin....welcome! I'm sorry that you are struggling so, and that your last session with your therapist ended in such a painful way. Uncertainty is a terrifying thing, especially for those of us who desire routine and plans. Yes, you are facing some big changes, but you have worked hard to be able to make this transition. You are graduating! Congrats!
Did you have a follow-up plan for when you leave your school? Such as a therapist in the location where you are moving? This is a time when you need the support of someone who can keep you accountable with your recovery, and also help you adjust to this change.
You have the choice whether to allow the ED to take over, or to set up a safety plan for yourself to prevent a relapse. You truly do! What do you need to stay safe from relapse, and who can you call on to be a support? This site is a great place to share and give/receive support! Please share more and let us know what you need!
Take care...Jan ♥