New herejust thinking out loud about my new relationship

I just started dating a man 3 months ago. I am old enough to know what a good connection is and isn't. We have a phenomenal connection. The first time he looked at me there was this energy between us that was insane. I knew we would at the very least become amazing friends.

Fast forward to now....We were super NOT careful about preventing a pregnancy. Of course I got pregnant. We both decided that what was best for our relationship as well as my daughter was to terminate the pregnancy. I know it was the correct thing to do, but there are all these insane emotions that follow that decision. I never realized it would be like this. I find myself getting upset easier over the littlest things, crying over nothing, and losing my mind whenever he is away from me.

Back story......every single relationship that I have had has resulted in the guy always cheating on me. (My first boyfriend beat the hell out of me for years.)

Ever since the abortion, it seems that all my insecurities are coming to the forefront. I worry he will leave me for another woman. I freak out that he will cheat and I will never know. I get sad when he goes to hang out with friends. I hate that I am struggling with trusting him because I do know that he adores me and my daughter to no end. I just feel that he doesn't understand the emotional and physical pain that having an abortion entails.

I need to say though that he really is VERY good to me and always making sure I am okay. Always taking care of me and my daughter's needs.

I guess my concern is how do I let all my past stuff go so I don't push someone that is perfect for me away????

Hi. Sounds like a world of pain and confusion going on, hope I can help a little.Your man probably cares deeply for you, probably has strong feelings of his own about the abortion, but don't expect him to understand everything you're going through about this -he can't. Only you can.
If you are going to focus on your past experiences, worry about whether he'll cheat or leave;if you're going to put him in a position where he has to spend his time with you trying to convince you that everything is ok, he will eventually cheat or leave.
You need to talk, openly, honestly, and constantly to get through this stage of your relationship.
I will tell you, as a man, there is hothing that will make me walk away from a relationship faster than to feel like I'm being "clung to".
Best of everything to you both!

yes you've been hurt a lot in the past so it's ok to be cautious but you can't stress out over this guy and accuse him of things he has not done because he will not like it. Would yo like it if his ex girl friend cheated on him and now he was always accusing you of cheating? NO! Talk to him openly about how you feel about the abortion. It's hard for him to understand as he wasn't the one that had the abortion. I'm sure he has his own feelings about it but they may or may not be the same as yours. He might just not show his feelings because he is trying to be strong for you. It's not healthy for you to freak out when he leaves and try to keep him there all the tiem because you're affraid he will cheat. He might be a good guy and not looking to cheat on you but if you constantly accuse him of cheating or if he gets the feeling you don't trust him you might drive him away. He won't necessarily cheat on you but he might break up with you if he feels you don't trust him and constantly accuse him and everyday he feels he has to deffend his innocence. Yes there are many men out there that cheat but not all do. So keep an open mind with this guy. Don't assume he's perfect but don't assume he's bad either because that will only damage the relationship. Communication is important in a relationship so I suggest talking to him openly about things and also asking him how he feels about things. Listen to eachother. Good Luck. I hope it works out!