New to the group

Hi, my name is Sarah, I am from Minnesota and suffer from Major depressive disorder, anxiety, and epilepsy. I am a certified nursing assistant and enjoy helping other people! I am married but my husband works a lot; because I am unable to work right now, so I am alone most of the time which contributes to my depression and anxiety. My family also lives 3 hours away and I don't know many people so I really feel I have no one. I am hoping this group will help me and I will meet new people. Although I have suffered from depression for almost 15 years, it doesn't get any easier and to me lonliness is the absolute hardest part.

Hey there Sarah, welcome. I have suffered with depression, although not as long as you, I certainly know what it feels like. Being lonely is so hard. I found myself feeling quite helpless because in my head I was constantly telling myself, get up, go do something, you're wasting your time, you can't be this weak. And as much as I believed all of those things, I physically could not get up and motivate for the life of me. I would isolate from my friends and pretty much hide out at home with my dogs and watch endless amounts of tv or get lost in a book. I was in a relationship at the time so naturally he got ignored which led to our relationship having problems, which led to my depression getting worse. It was an endless cycle of "I can't win". I was on medication for a short period of time, didn't find them to be helpful whatsoever. They worked for me in the past, but this time around, not one stitch of progress. I don't know what will work for you, but for me it was keeping busy. I am a person who doesn't break promises so I sort of tricked myself by making plans with many people knowing I wouldn't flake on them. It slowly started getting me out of the house, I picked up a few hobbies that required me to also leave the house. Little things added up and now I have a job that requires a lot of my time. Just know you aren't alone and if and when you need to talk, I'm here along with many others on this incredible site.

xo, July

Thank you so much, I know you are right. I am actually thinking of volunteering at a nursing home a few days a week and I am starting school in a week so I hope that helps. I would definately like to keep talking though.
Thanks again!
Sarah