Not sure how to feel anymore or what to do I have been with

Not sure how to feel anymore or what to do I have been with my husband 10 years and it has been miserable 75% of the time. We have two children 2 months and 6 I have tried my hardest to stick this out I'm emotionally and physically drained . he has cheated on me numerous times over 8 that I know a it who knows how many more he will deny it tillt he day he dies but I have so much proof and half the time I bring it up he makes it my fault and doesn't say no he hasn't all the time sometimes he just says what do you want me to do. I just want to scream I want him to be a 40+ yt old man and admit to his wrong doings I'm so hurt I do love him I know part of it was because I had gained weight but I have recently just quit eating but once a day sometimes none to try and get him to stop cheating and dropped 135 lbs in a year and a half . I don't know what to do or how to feel to top it off he became ill health Dr gave him 1 to 9 years to live and that was 2 years ago so I feel like I have to be here for him to take care of him and so he don't lose any time with our kids but same since I'm scared he's gonna cheat again I question everything he does I dread when he leaves the house I get sick evrytime he answers his phone. He's constantly on porn sites and throws woman in my face puts me down anytime a woman is around I feel terrible inside . like I just want to give up if I didn't have my girls please help me on what to do or any advice ..

1 Heart

Leave him. He sounds awful. You owe him nothing. Just my opinion. But life is too short to be treated like that.

2 Hearts

@Kiliannesmommy09 I felt your pain, and frustration through your post. My heart goes out to you, for you so loved your husband. But he's a behaving so badly, and treating you so cruelly. Did he started cheating before or after his diagnosis, of 1 to 9 years to live? Wait, I just read over your post, he's been cheating for the 8 years, you have been married, that you know of.... You have been married for 10 years! He denies his cheating, when you bring it up. In addition he makes it, that's it your fault, he doesn't denied it. But has said that, what you wanted him to do? You had gained weight, recently you've quit eating , just once a day, sometimes no eating at all? Yes, to get him to stopped cheating, and you dropped 135 lbs in a year, and a half.... This wasn't very healthy, and drastic. Wow! Next time tried to lose weight healthier, please. When a man cheats on his wife, or partner it's not about her. It's all about him! Has he stopped cheating, since you lost all that weight? No! You have a 6, and 2 months daughters, of course you will gained some weight. Your husband is still on porn sites, and constantly throws women in your face.... Also he puts you down anytime a woman is around... You feel terrible inside. You are so scared everytime he has left the house, or he answered the phone. Yes, at the end of the day, you wanted to be there, to take care of him in his illness , and so he won't losed time with the kids. Wow, you're such a good wife, and mother.... If only your husband knew, how much you're sacrificing for him..... You are my hero! I don't know what advice to give you, I don't mean to be offensive, or hurtful, but your husband doesn't seemed to want to change his cheating ways..... In the meanwhile, you are hurting so.much ..... Maybe SG friends who are more experienced, than I, and are going through the same situation liked you, would be able to give you more advice. . My thoughts, and prayers are with your family, and you. SG friends are here, to support, and be supported. Hugs my friend.

1 Heart

I wouldn't live my life a minute longer with him, he is not worth it. He's a serial "cheater" and he won't stop, plus he's mentally abusing you. Leave him and start taking care of "You". See a therapist and start your healing process. Do it for yourself and your girls. Congrats on losing all that weight. You're amazing!!!!