Not sure how to feel

This will be my first Christmas without my dad. Usually we see my parents every other year for Christmas. Last year we saw them out of turn so this year we won't be there on Christmas Day but will be after. I expect things with family to be akward. Before the memorial service I finally had an emotional talk with my sister about how I feel that she mistreats me and about part of the childhood abuse I suffered, including being afraid of our dad. I have not seen my mom or siblings for 6 months.

I'm sorry hun. It does sound like it will be difficult. I'm glad you spoke with your sister. I hope things improve for you. Hugs!