just trying to figure everything out...
ive done so many things since i was a kid and have never had a label of OCD on it...
ive always liked things even... like to feel even on both sides of my body...
like if i touch something hot/cold with one hand, i dont feel (for lack of a better word) RIGHT on the other side... if i dont do it i kind of get a sick, anxious feeling in my stomach until i just do it. But its like that with everything on both sides... if i hit my shoulder on the door, i feel compelled to turn around and hit my other shoulder on the door too... if that makes any sense. I will sit and blink like a crazy person trying to make my eyes feel "even".... and i walk around like a crazy person avoiding cracks like its my job...
another stange thing is my nails, i obsess over my nails continuously... i bite them and the skin around them until it hurts because im trying to make them look perfect, but they always end up looking terrible! its the weirdest thing because sometimes i dont even realize im doing it...
i guess one of the hardest things is my imagination runs wild with really terrible thoughts... like people around me dying or me dying... i also imagine thoughts that i did something wrong and i feel like im lying to myself when i say I DIDNT DO THAT... even thought i KNOW i didnt.... i will check things 100 times over and over again but i never believe they are right...
i feel like this is OCD, but i dont know the steps of what to do... i made an appointment with my family doctor but she cant see me until the end of july... i feel like its getting worse and its becoming intolerable to live with.... any ideas?
I think the desire to label it is OCD lol. The important part to remember is. If you are obsessed with something, have compulsions, or both; that cause anxiety and take time out of your day it's ocd. Otherwise it's just you being a goober.
Alicia17,
Have you taken any online tests to see if you are OCD? And I would recommend contacting a therapist not your family Doctor unless you want a recommendation for a therapist or psychiatrist. I have alot of what you have and I was diagnosed about 7 months ago. But Marcus is right in asking, do these things interfere with your every day life?
Good luck in your quest!
Jodi
OMG, Reading your post is like reading my diary! The only difference is i'm not so worried about left and right, just doing things in two's. If i hit my shoulder on a door, i have to hit it again. When i see a stop sign out of the corner of my eye, i have to turn my head to see it agiasn! I have always been like this but it comes and goes in it's intensity. I have learnt to recognize that the more i focus on it, the worse it gets. When my husband and i first started dating he would snicker and roll his eyes eery time he caught me flicking the lights on and off again an extra time or turnign the windshield wipers on and off an extra time, but once i explained to him that it made me self conscious and forced me to think abotu it more which in turn made me do it more... he stopped. Now he says he barely notices it anymore and we can actually laugh about it together sometimes.
I have spoken to countless doctors about it, and they all basically say the same thing, is it affecting/interfering with your life. And for me the answer is no, not really. In fact, I barely notice i do it anymore, and the only time i do is when it involves other people.
The funniest times are when i'm riding the tube or bus and i bump into someone... i'm in agony until the train makes another little bump that i can use as an excuse to bump into that person again, lol.
I don't know how it is with you, but the way i explain it to people who ask, is by saying it's like scratching an itch. I don't know why i have to do it, but i just know i can't think about anything else until i do it.
OMG, Reading your post is like reading my diary! The only difference is i'm not so worried about left and right, just doing things in two's. If i hit my shoulder on a door, i have to hit it again. When i see a stop sign out of the corner of my eye, i have to turn my head to see it agiasn! I have always been like this but it comes and goes in its intensity. I have learnt to recognize that the more i focus on it, the worse it gets. When my husband and i first started dating he would snicker and roll his eyes eery time he caught me flicking the lights on and off again an extra time or turnign the windshield wipers on and off an extra time, but once i explained to him that it made me self conscious and forced me to think abotu it more which in turn made me do it more... he stopped. Now he says he barely notices it anymore and we can actually laugh about it together sometimes.
I have spoken to countless doctors about it, and they all basically say the same thing, is it affecting/interfering with your life. And for me the answer is no, not really. In fact, I barely notice i do it anymore, and the only time i do is when it involves other people.
The funniest times are when i'm riding the tube or bus and i bump into someone... i'm in agony until the train makes another little bump that i can use as an excuse to bump into that person again, lol.
I don't know how it is with you, but the way i explain it to people who ask, is by saying it's like scratching an itch. I don't know why i have to do it, but i just know i can't think about anything else until i do it.
The most important thing is never stop resisting the urges. If you do it gets harder to resist.I know it is trying,but you must always fight it. Thier only mind games. When you have OCD you must play them, but, always play to win.
Oh, i'm the opposite James.
I rarely resist. When i do, it's only to wait until a more convenient/less embarrassing time to do whatever it is i just did again. (like i said earlier, My OCD shows itself in two's)
I find if i try to fight it, i just end up thinking about it more and then more things bug me and it gets worse and worse. Instead, i just don't let it work itself into my conscious thoughts. I do it if i have to, and refuse to think about it if i don't have to.
not sure if that would work for everyone, but it works for me.
I resist constantly,if I didn’t I would not be able to make a living,except in a sideshow.At first (40 years ago),
it took a lot of effort.In time became second nature to me.
I still have to keep my guard up.Over the years I have started and overcome dozens of compulsions.