One time I was totally having panic attacks and Depressed while HOCD strikes after hearing that my friend wanting to sleep with ladies. I directly decided to see a neurologist who prescribed me Paxil for my panic attacks and told me since u fear of being lesbian or fear of doing anything this means that you will not so don't be scared. Paxil directly made HOCD and all he thoughts vanish after one month. I stopped Paxil in Late December and since then I had 4 relapses 2 HOCD and one panic attack and one unwanted thoughts about harming people ( this lasted 7 days well all off them lasted maximum 10 days except for the second HOCD which has started on April 27. I realised that ever time I'm stressed out or depressed or having my PMS, I am prone to unwanted thoughts. Since one week, I have been better but not completely. I keep questioning everything and my brain tries to imagine stuff doing with ladies but I don't feel sexual to such thoughts just anxiety. I want to ask does HOCD make up you question everything like a friend of mine bought me chocolate today and I was directly she must be lesbian. I have the tendencies to make everyone gay and lesbian which also scares me. I cannot look much to the TV I cannot go to parties or beach or anything just because I am scared of seeing someone and say she looks nice and HOCD hits back. I have reached a point where even if I am a bit better, I have the fear of relapsing the fear the thoughts coming back. I also sometimes lose the attraction towards guys mostly When HOCD is strong and makes me confused of whether I am into guys or no. I know that before this how I was and this kind of eases the anxiety.
Stop checking and stop fighting the thoughts. it only makes the HOCD stronger. Of course you still like guys youre just focusing too hard. Its going to be scary to "accept" these thoughts but it will get you over this HOCD.
Hi thx now im a bit better than last week but last week a colleague of mine was nice to me and she was wearing good nice clothes and suddenly my mind was you must like her in that way and since one week everytime i enter the office and pass by her my mind just focuses on her. I reached a point where if she just talks to me i say i must like her in a lesbian way. My brain is just focused on this now and minor other stuff related to HOCD but this is strong. I am scared to start believing and im scared coz i cannot get rid of the thought. Like she was planning to go out after work and my brain said u must be jealous of her friends coz they will get to meet her. I am able a bit to change the thoughbt but since it is strong i cannot just remove it as if it is stuck in my head. I hope this also goes away coz im tired everytime i get a bit better something happens the fear is killing me and the fear is making me question everything and the brain gives answers which are not true. Is this all normal with HOCD? Thx