Pink Lightning Time ( A poem )

Hello friends,

Today I decided to share with you all a poem I have written. I am trying to get my poetry published but feel afraid to because I don't think that can happen for me, but I am pushing through the negative to positive.

Now, this is not about ED at all, but about time in general. I usually never write of ED cause I see poetry as an escape of positivity for me. This is about time--the enigma of time ---and what I percieve time to be.
I do beleive wholeheartedly that positivity can battle ED or anything...especially when we meditate upon positive words...

Pink Lightning Time

Pink effervescence...
Like emerging crystalline morning dew,
Fiery sparks of cotton candy--
Shimmer into blue -topaz lakes...
Multi-faceted diamonds sprinkle luminosity--

Into virtual velocity and powerful momentum.
Time seeps into imagination's corner--
Falling away with faint breath and
Thunderous omnipotent speed,

Like a raging dark grey locamotive--
Crashing upon frail dusty tracks.
Time--the ruler of present, past, and future--
Descends into constant ever-changing reality...

Unknowing, spontaneous and giddy--
Like a four year old playing jump rope...
What does time have in store for us?
Can we escape time?

No, its pink diamond hands grasp
Our every turning liquid moment
So that as seconds become minutes become
Hours become days become months and years--

Into spiralling helpless oblivion.
Existance soon becomes colorful blurs
In melodious chaotic rhapsody.
Oh father time--

How one marvles at your intricate presence...
Knowing, not knowing--
Breaking underlying rules and
Life's blueprint and fragile emotions--
Into a reckless bridge between
reality and non reality.

Pink spheres shine into violet- gold skies-
Another days ends yet again too soon.
Time wins again.

Wow, Maureen! This poem is EXCELLENT- truly amazing! I think you should definitely get it published! Why do you say you don't think that could happen for you??
Thank you for sharing this!

wow maureen

truly amazing!!! u guys are just an inspiration. you all write amazing poetry. i have to write one of my poems on here even though its horrible.

but have confidence in yourself maureen. never give up ur dreams

awww thanks so much lizzy!!!

hey dont you dare go knocking yourself you are a brilliant artist! ive seen your work!!!

thank you so much for your kindness means the world…to me…

love
maureen

thank you sooo much, chelsea--ha,

so so kind of you---

my parents always put down/made fun of my dreams when i was young and as i got older--so i never ever thought i was good at anything...so i thought i was worthless...
or couldnt do anything well...or could never succeed.

so thanks chelsea, thanks much as your words do mean so much to me. it helps mend my heart..

funny thing though--as much as my mom always insulted me and put me down, she did like my writing....ha, funny about that one--i dont get it at all...

love ya so much

maureen

hi guys,
hehehe writing this made me kinda forget the little wieght i gained..

yeah, i ve always thought i couldnt do anything well from my severely bad upbringing.... i honestly thought i couldnt ever succeed at anything. that thought still haunts me now...im working on it , but it is hard. do you know ED tells me im too fat to write? too fat to write--how absurd??? ughhh...

i so hope one day i can conquer the thought i cant do anything well, but it is a hard one to get over..

love ya

maureen

Maureen- ED is pretty absurd, huh! I think ED doesn’t want you to write because it’s something that makes you happy, free, joyous- all things that ED is NOT!!!
That poem is amazing, as I’m sure all your others are too. Don’t let ED ruin that! You’re so talented!
It’s funny because I definitely didn’t like ED before I joined this support group, but now I absolutely despise him/her! It sickens me to see how ED abuses intelligent, beautiful, caring women like you Maureen!

thanks for your words of encouragement

awwwwwwwww thanks so much, chelsea!!!!!! so kind of you!!! so wonderful of you to say---

you know what???????? i did it--i submitted that poem and another one of mine into a poetry ezine!!! ill see in 2 months if i got accepted!!! im excited but terrribly scared of rejection. i dont think it will get in, the other poets are really good. sigh... im seriously seriously scared of rejection cause then i will bw worthless like my mom said. so im scared..sigh. but nothing ventured , nothing gained.

the bad news is my weight keeps flunctuating so much that i need to go see a doctor. it is scaring me to death. when you mess with your body's natural weight( as jan always says) you end up messing up your body badly. so i either one---need to get checked out or two--wait until my body heals itself and not force my body to be something it is not. when we force our bodies to be something it is not, we only mess up our bodies functions and make our body flip out. so , all of my trying to be something im not has hurt my body--therefore causing my poor body to go crazy. i only hope it heals in time...sigh...
( but yea ED is now totally telling me im too fat to write...)

thanks so much to you, chelsea!!!!!

love
maureen

I'm sorry to hear your weight has been fluctuating so much! I'm glad you're going to see a doctor...that makes me really worried! I've been frustrated lately because even though I've been eating more, I've actually become hypermetabolic and have lost a few more pounds!! I guess that's something that happens initially for a lot of people when they begin to add calories. It's really discouraging though because I'm trying soo hard...Oh well...
Maureen, can you share any of the other poems you've written? You certainly don't have to, but I'd love to see them! I;m sure they're amazing too. Im so proud of you for submitting them to the ezine!!!! But even if they are not accepted, that DOES NOT mean you are a failure at all or worthless. It could just be completely random- even based on the mood the judges are in that day! It makes me so angry that your mother made you feel that way. You are in no way worthless!!!!

sure , i could share some more---but do you think it is appropriate for the site? my writing doesnt have to do with EDS, you know??? it is more about--the beauty of life(something i need to acknowledge myself)

but sure, id like to share more if youd like that--that is so sweet! ha,so sweet of you....

i actually havent written in a long time cuz i thought it was dumb, and ED took that spark away from me. telling me i was too fat and dumb to write and i felt that my body had to be perfect in order to do anything in life. i spend so much time focusing on my body i forget about my brain. and other things id like to do in life...sucks, huh?

i feel i have lost my writing spark cuz ED took it away. ughhh ill get it back though-ED takes away so much..

yes i am scared about the flunctuation---i really am. the week before i was losing a lot quickly which i was sorta happy about but deep down i was frightened . and this week im spiking up quickly. something is totally wrong here. and 3 weeks beofore all of this i was gaining fast...it is really getting scary to me.

thanks chelsea--for your lovely bright wonderful words!

love
maureen

Of course they're appropriate for this site! Or you could just message me or email them to me or whatever. I love that the focus of your poems is the beauty of life- it is something that ED causes me to forget sometimes! I hope you do get back into writing more! Isn't ED insane sometimes- I hate that it was telling you that you were too fat too write!!!! You're a wonderful, talented writer and human being in general- and it has NOTHING to do with your weight!

yes ED sure does take the beauty of life away, doesnt it???

i messaged you...about the poems, i might also add more to the site...

thank you so much chelsea---your words really do help stomp out that blackened decaying negative part of my mind.... thanks so much to you

love
maureen

Maureen: YOur poetry is beautiful; I honestly think you should pursue writing a book of poetry and send to a publisher.
Love you!

awwwwwwwwww thanks so much molly, your words are soo kind ....

i actually did send this out to a literary ezine----we will see what happens in about 2 months!!! im so scared!!! and i am working on my poetry book ive been putting off for soooooooo long now. years in fact.

thanks so much, your words mean so much to me!

love
maureen

oh PS molly--

i just sent you an email