Hey everyone,
I'm pretty new to this site, actually this is my first post. Please take it easy on me, last forum I sought support from attacked me with religious views and criticism. I have no issue with either as long as it's in small doses. :]
Anyway, I've seemed to hit a rough patch these past 2 years. I'm not really sure what's wrong with me, all I know is I've changed tremendously from the person I was before. To make things more clear; I used to be a very out-going and confident person. Today however, I don't feel comfortable going out in public or even to a family members house. I dread being invited to social events or even small get-togethers. When I go somewhere, it feels as though everyone is looking at me and judging me. I can't carry on a conversation, let alone, pay attention to what a person is saying because I get so caught up in my negative thoughts. Negative thoughts such as; I'm going to say something stupid that they'll use against me, or even worse, I won't have anything to say at all because my mind goes blank. I feel as though I am constantly driving myself insane with these self-conscious thoughts in my head, that I simply can't ignore.
In addition, leaving the house is a huge hassle because I take hours to get ready. From changing my outfit a million times, to moving a single strand of hair. Usually, I'm still not comfortable with how I look when I leave the house and it can be quite frustrating. I can spend an unlimited amount of time looking at myself in the mirror, criticizing every detail. I know everyone has insecurities, and that I can not expect myself to be perfect. I try very hard to change my thoughts into positive ones but I feel as though I am just lying to myself to make myself feel better.
I used to be "the funniest person you've ever met," as I've heard in the past. I miss being so care-free and happy. Now, I seem to struggle getting through each day. It's like someone is choking me, I can't breathe. My heart races with my thoughts. I am easily confused and can't concentrate. Also, I can't eat a full meal without having to rush to the bathroom. What the hell happened?! I used to have it together. I don't know who I am anymore and I'm pushing everyone away. Any helpful advice would be much appreciated. Thankyou for taking the time to read, sorry if it was too long or repetitive!
well hi there snick, welcome to support groups hun. lots of great people here to help. so may i ask a few questions? maybe this will give us all something to go to pass on our experiences or some advise we ourselves have received. are you under the care of a doctor? are you seeing a therapist? could be wise to consider since there seems to have been some drastic changes that you have noticed in yourself. how old are you hun? your just real cute in your picture. let us know what else we can do for you. maybe if you supply a bit more info we can point you in the direction for further assistance.
Hi Kathy, I'm 20 years old. I haven't been to a therapist since high school and the last time I went to a doctor was in October. I probably wouldn't have even gone but my stepmom forced me because I was missing periods. The gyno sent me for a blood test and said my hormone levels came back normal. Since then, I've had my period but it's still not regular. The doctor said it may have to do with my being over-weight. However since then I've lost 20 pounds, and I don't even know why. I don't make doctor's appointments because I usually end up cancelling last minute from anxiety about being weighed and having my body looked at. I don't know if this information is at all useful. I know I should probably see a therapist, but I keep questioning myself.. like what if they find nothing wrong with me? I'll be embarrassed and disappointed.
well hun, if they don't find something wrong with you, then thats good. could be something as simple as anxiety and there is medication that you can take for that. so you may want to see a therapist and see what they have to say. they can advise you medically if needed from there. in the meantime you can feel free to post here all you'd like, lots of great people here for support.
It sounds like you really need someone professional to talk to. Anxiety can do strange things to your body and your mind. It can make your mind and body play tricks on you. The good news is that if it is anxiety there is so much that you can do about it. There are medications, therapy, relaxation techniques that you can use. Also it looks like you are thinking very negatively, keep up the positive self talk, eventually you will start to believe it. I think your first step has to be to see you doctor and go from there. Thinking about you,
Alex
Thankyou guys for the advice and support. Very much appreciated. I am currently looking for a therapist to talk to and in the meantime I'm just going to focus on being more positive. Doesn't hurt to try right? I'll update you guys after I speak with the doc. hope you all have a good weekend!! -stevie
Snick, you definitely have both the right attitude and the right approach. I never would've thought about seeing a therapist in the past but hit a point in January where I couldn't deny any longer that I needed help. It has made a huge difference for me in getting me back on the right track and I'm sure it will help you as well...until then, stay positive and know that you have all of the folks here in supportgroups available if you need us!