Recently diagnosed struggling to acceptplease help

Mental Health Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
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Last december I had a psychological evaluation and I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have since done so much research over the internet and I just don't think I have it. Of course anybody that has been through any kind of trauma is going to have some stress in their lives for some time afterward...I don't deny that at all. I was molested when I was 12 and although it only happened once it dramatically changed the course of my life. Before I was a normal happy kid. I did really good in school and didn't have any problems at home. After the molestation, I began drinking and experimenting with drugs, having sex, and engaging in unhealthy relationships. It wasn't even until I was 17 that I looked back on my life and I myself realized that it was after that one single incident that my life took such a dramatic turn. My life wasn't threatened by being molested. I experienced intense fear and horror, but I never had nightmares or flashbacks. So why have I been diagnosed with PTSD?

I haven't always been in denial about this. At first I was very accepting it was almost a relief to find out that this anxiety disorder is the reason I continue to relapse on meth after long periods of sobriety. Something triggers me and I just go. But the more I read about the causes and the symptoms, I just don't think I fit the criteria. And it doesn't help that I was diagnosed by a Clinical and Forensic Psychologist, then The Mental Health Therapist I worked with afterward said she doesn't think I have it. Now I'm working with a Liscensed Clinical Social Worker who thinks I DO have it and she sends me to a psychiatrist for meds and he DOESN'T think I have it!!!! I have been completely honest with everyone of these people so that I can get the proper diagnosis and treatment. Afterall it is my mental health that I am concerned about!! It is the professionals in my life that can't make up their minds and in the meantime I'm being pulled back and forth. So once again I turn to the internet. Support groups have helped me with my drug problem I am certain they can help me with this too. What do you think?

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Medical field cant accomplish everything for all of us, wish they could. I was molested from ages 2-12 & pretty much life played out as you describe. I feel it is up to us to lead/teach/guide & learn ourselves & keep looking within for answers, the way one is raised, genetic links if applicable, the past, as you've done thus far, as much as possible. There is no quick answer/fix or pill. You may have to follow your gut instincts sometimes. Anything through the years can trigger something out of us to remind us of our past & again its up to us. Your doing a wonderful job of trying to get the right help. What do you feel about YOU??? There might be a combination of things going on.

April

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Trust your gut if you can. Do you think you have PTSD? I choose to work only with those professionals that I feel comfortable with, who are kind, and have the time to focus on my issues. This is a hard road in recovery. I don't want to educate mt therapists any more. If the don't have training in treating PTSD then I don't waste my time. I have had the same therapist now for several years and I trust her professional judgement. I went through a few to find her, but she's the one for now...Yeah! Hang in there. and trust yourself too.

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AnonLady, I have dabbled a little bit in reaseaching how mental illnesses are diagnosed. It really is not as clear-cut and dry as one might think. Quite the opposite actually.

There is always margin for being un- or misdiagnosed. The reason is because many different mental disorders have symptoms that are mimmicked in more than one disorder.

The DSM-IV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Edition) is what Therapists, Psychologists and Psychiatrists use in order to diagnose patients.

It was originally published in 1994 with and update added in 2000. The 5th edition is due for publication sometime in the next 3 years to reflect advances in medicine and research.

Basically, it will be more up to date. It has been 16 years since it was originally written and 10 since the last update!

There are hopes that the DSM-V will aid in giving patients a more clear and conscise diagnosis.

As frustrating as that may be, we have to remember that those who treat us for mental disorders are not gods, there are no magic pills to make us better and there is a reason they call it practicing medicine.

With that being said, having a mental and/or physical disorder does not make you less of a person. I believe it makes you more human than most. It gives you an understanding and capability to support and encourage others facing similar trials.

I cringe when someone says "Why can't I be normal?"

I would rather be UN-NORMAL.

So called "normal" people are usually shallow, superficial, selfish and fake. They are self-absorbing and usually feel little compassion for those around them nor see the needs of others.

I have personally found those of us who have been "gifted" with issues and illnesses are more willing to share in each others hardships and are often more supportive simply because we live it too.

Embrace who you are, take your time seeking treatment, get multiple opinions until you find someone you are comfortable seeing, share how you are doing and what you are feeling, work towards being comfortable, not perfection.

Good luck!