Recovered AnorexicBulimic afraid of passing disease on to children

I have been recovered for about 15 years now. My husband and I are considering having children. A close family member is suspected as having an eating disorder. Since I am the only one in the family who could possibly understand, I went to visit with them. They looked so ill but are in full denial. I was flooded with emotions. I was taken straight back to all those feelings of when I was in a state of denial. It was almost unbearable. With all my experience I couldn't help! This isn't even MY child and I am a mess! Do I really want to go through this if I have a child and they have a serious issue. Even worse, an ED that they inherited from their Mommy!

Anyone have thoughts?!

i'm not 100% sure on this one but I've heard ED and/or addictive personalities can be passed on to children. i hope that is not the case as i have 2, ages 9 and 7. i try not to obsess over food with them but i realize i often talk about being healthy and overweight people. i fear of them being overweight b/c their father's side of the family is heavy -- all of them.

all you can do is place them in a healthy home and teach them good habits and try to catch yourself if you start to obsess about "healthy foods" or eating to much, weight, etc.

good luck to you,
caroline

Yes, eating disorders do have a genetic component, unfortunately. However, one bonus is that you're very familiar with the warning signs, having struggled with an eating disorder yourself. So, if, and I do mean *IF* your child(ren) had one (genes aren't everything, y'know), you would catch it very fast, before it got too bad, and you would know to seek treatment before it became life-threatening. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you create a healthy environment in your home, teach your children good eating habits, and keep an eye out for trouble, there's absolutely no reason not to have kids, if that's what you want to do.

Thanks for the comments. Not having children because I don't want to be upset if they have an eating disorder is a bit absurd. If I recovered from that hell, I should be able to deal with anything.

This brings into play the old adage of Nature vs. Nurture.

Yes, it is true that your offspring will have a predisposition to mental health issues (Nature). However, if you raise them in a healthy environment you will mostly likely not see those genetic possibilities become a reality (Nurture). Their environment is the KEY in how they will develop.

I hope you and husband decide on having children. There's just something about being a parent that gives you such incredible joy.

Good luck. :)

Lovsheadmeds, are you a parent too? Thanks for the post.

kittykad .... yes, I am. I have two kids.