For those in Recovery, I have a question for you. How did you do it/ what first pushed you? Therapy, Inpatient, Outpatient treatment team? I've been in Inpatient once, for 8 weeks.. but that was two years ago.
I'm just curious.
Well, I attend ED group therapy and am on wait lists for inpatient care...quite simply my reasons are that I want my life back. I just want to be ME again.
reason why i've been looking for help for the last year again is cause my life simply doesn't exist anymore. everything i had is getting lost under worries and thoughts about ED, my life is basically gone and it's only getting worse.
i did try to choose the 'easy' way out but as that failed i had to promise family and friends to never ever do it again. and i hate breaking a promise yet i can't live the way things are now so i gotta fight back.
it's a long and painful process though, not only going through therpay but even just to get into therapy. and it sucks how hard it is to get help, to have a professional bother to listen to you and take you serious. not gonna just happen but we have to persist. it's the only way out. i guess if our ED can be that tough, we can be too!!
I agree Maedi, just be persistant. It really upsets me a great deal that when we reach out for help we get told we have to wait 3, 4, 5, 6 months for the help we need...who the hell knows what shape we will be in in that time, you know? UGH, so frustrating!!
hmmmmm first my fiancee wanted recovery for me or he said we were thorugh..that wasn't what got me well though..
it was---a deep deep seeded guilt for what i was doing to my body and hurting it so much... destroying my health day by day... it was a rage against the very thing ED , that was killing my happiness and making miserable. it was the knowledge that i will die if i dont stop this now.
also the fact it was destroying my relationship, my life, my health, my body, my dreams, my mental health, my sanity, my happiness, my goals, and isolating me into a corner....
i developed a deep deep anger against ED and stopped it in its tracks....
i decided not to care what people think i look like and if they dont like how i look then they can go far far away...
i decided to be me and not please others or have others excpecations upon me...
also i decided to stop watching t.v. , and movies that were triggering to me cause their idiotic toxic messages of weight loss were driving me nuts! so one day i wrote off the media and deicided to completely IGNORE all of their evil twisted sick messages and be me. now i dont even look at magazines now although i do watch t.v . and some movies but i make sure they are ok for me to watch...
it is something i wanted to do for ME....to live to breathe--to get back the life ED was making me lose...
love
maureen
Everyones reasons for recovery are different...ultimately you have to want to get better for yourself.
After trying so many therapists, programs and groups, the thing that finally got me to recover completely from all eating disorders was me.
I ended up so frustrated and broken, so hopeless that I just gave up any form of control over food or my weight.
Now I have had full recovery for several years.
I am a healthy weight, I eat what I want, I stop when I am full and I never obsess about food or my weight.
You can read more about my story and recovery here:
www.helpforeatingdisorder.com
or you can email me at [email protected]
My boyfriend pushed me. I was tired of depression, I was tired of feeling weak, I was tired of never meeting up to my expectations. I just wanted to be happy. My boyfriend loves me, and I want a future with him, I want children with him, and I need to beat this in order to do that. Its a struggle to fight everyday but its worth it :)
Hi Maedi - I really like what you said "if Ed can be that tough, we can too"
I believe that as awful as the struggle with ED was, it has made me a tougher person and I have learned that I can get through anything.
I remember thinking while I was in the grip of it that if I can get through this, get to the other side, I will KNOW that anything in life is possible.
I am on the other side now, and it makes any challenge in life that much easier to take on. It will give you the courage to achieve things that most people wouldnt have.
xx