*sigh* I’m still struggling with this porn addiction. I’

*sigh* I’m still struggling with this porn addiction. I’m not sure where I can turn to but I just can’t stop. I don’t have many friends and I’m starting to drink and smoke more. It’s sounds easy to just never look at this stuff ever again. But I always find myself bored and alone majority of the time. It may seem like I don’t want to stop, but there’s always a huge weight of disappointment in myself after each time. If someone can provide some help or maybe a phone number for counseling I’d greatly appreciate it.

2 Hearts

It is very easy, it is a fight most days, a hard fight to stop, to be sober. To be a better person. Have you looked at SA.org, SAA.org, or other groups to see if they are in your area?

1 Heart

One of the things to think about also. If you keep satisfying yourself sexually, you don't feel the need to look for someone else in your life to be sexual with or have a relationship. If a person uses his/her imagination to satisfy their needs. Then they satisfy themselves much less. But if they use Porn, the porn kick starts that need quickly, over and over. Boredom creates to much time to think about sex, masturbation, porn. It's one thing to relax and just hang out alone at home for short periods. It's another to go to work and then do next to nothing at home except think about porn and jump on the computer. You need a social life. You should think about getting involved in a Hobby. Preferably a social hobby. Bowling, Dart playing, Shooting Pool. There are all types of things to get into socially in ANYONES area. Look up things to do in your area on the internet. Even Craigslist has lists of social activities, (Nonsexual) in many categories. People that want to meet people in a group setting for dining out, jogging, archery, disc golfing etc. etc.
People that have addictions also have every excuse in the book as to why they can't stop. Or why they can't do this or do that. Addiction is HARD. Don't let anyone tell you different. But if YOU want change in your life, no therapist can make you stop. Or make you leave the house and be more social. You have to want to quit and make a better life for yourself, so much.... that you finally do something. And keeping busy and away from the computer/porn is a big one. I get bored easy with most anything. So..... I have a lot of hobbies. In my state,you can prospect for gold, (I love to camp and fish and commune with nature). So they all tie in. Plus metal detect, bottle hunt for 100 yr. old bottles. I collect stamps, and collect anything to do with the American Civil War. I hike a lot with my dogs. I cook, I read a great deal. I have quite a few Large Aquariums, that take a lot of work cleaning and arranging. In spring, I am constantly working in my vegetable garden or flower garden. Okay, so my point is..... find things YOU enjoy and get out there and do them. Even if it's by yourself. Your doing more than being bored at home and letting your imagination take over. What do you think a therapist is going to tell you? Pretty much the same thing. You can't think your problems away. You need to change your life style and create a new you!

@constructionjim. Thanks for your advice and thanks for following up with me. I’ve always been the kind of guy to really always keep to himself and kinda be a loner. I always let my thoughts take over, even when its not about addiction. I’ve always been the type of person to put myself down and believe I’m not worth anything. I have a lot of self hatred and sometimes it’s hard for me to branch out into anything. This might even sound like I’m making even more excuses but it’s hard for me to change this kind of mindset. I’m super shy and really anxious, so whenever I drink, smoke, or watch porn it makes things easier to get my mind off of my insecurities. I have a worse addiction problem than I could’ve ever imagined. Things really are impacting my finances, and the people that are still in my life are starting to really respect me less and less. I’m happy to see I actually get some type of response on here and I just hope I end up somewhere in life. Because at this rate I’m just going to end up being a homeless drunk. I appreciate you, and I hope I don’t let myself down like I always do .

Sorry to hear that. Either way, with to much time on your hands, you will keep back sliding. Find a hobby or something to keep your mind and body motivated instead of sitting idle.

@constructionjim I understand that I need to find hobbies during the day. Which would definitely help. But what do I do when I go to to lay down before I sleep? My mind just keeps racing with anything. So obviously I resort to porn, it even helps me go to sleep faster. There’s nothing I can do in that short hour or 2 when I lay down before I get to sleep.

It's like any addiction, you have to work at it. Let's face it, no one says it's easy. Most restaurants sell alcohol, but even alcoholics go out to eat. It's how much you put into stopping yourself. But I still think there's more to it, since you can't go out much, meet people or make friends.

@constructionjim I really appreciate having some type of conversation with you. I don’t really expect much from here since this is all anonymous and online. But I really am grateful for this interaction. I think I may need more help and guidance on more serious level though. It’s hard for me to go out and talk to random strangers. My insecurities rule my life, and it’s only getting worse as I get older. Thanks for keeping up with me and I’ll try to stay active and keep updating as I go along.

Support groups like these will help you and understand you. I found someone at Genesis Counseling Center to help with my problems, but they can be too spiritual at times and may not be for you. In my most recent therapy session, however, we talked about being content with oneself without needing pornography. We also talked about socializing as the antidote for these bad practices and habits. I'm finally talking to more people; I recently found a guy at my college who was willing to hang out. If you're like me and have high expectations of finding romance or sex, another goal is to become patient. It still annoys me to see sitcoms and TV shows where men in particular are made fun of for being virgins even when they were teenagers. Media creates really bad standards for people sometimes. It is tough, but I say learn to take risks, not feel sorry for yourself when it does not work out, and keep going. You can do this.

1 Heart

@Mo66box Yea, spending a lot of time alone give me more time to look at other things that make me feel sorry for myself. If it’s not porn, I feel bad watching other people having a great time on social media and tv. Overall being alone really isn’t good for me. But it is really all I know and it is what I have been comfortable with for a majority of my life. It is going to be super difficult for me moving on. Not looking at things that make me feel like crap. My alternative to these things would be so indulge in smoking or drinking alcohol. I have no idea how to approach people and be myself. The only time I leave my house is to go to the gym. It is really terrifying to think about starting a conversation with someone. How do I even start? What do I say? How can I expose who I am to someone without being in fear? This is all making me a super bitter, depressed, lonely guy. Moving on I’m just going to focus on not watching porn. I don’t have any idea on how to become more social.