Hey everybody. I am so utterly despondent about the holidays. This has been the 1st year I can't afford to go back home, the first time I miss my favorite niece's birthday, the first time I don't celebrate my birthday with my best friends in 6 years, the first time I don't get to see my family... On top of that, I feel more alone than ever. I feel like my boyfriend is trying, but he is getting irritated and annoyed with me, like he's totally uninterested... Sigh. This really sucks, I am really sad... My meds aren't helping, therapy isn't helping, music.. I am on a musical kick, I can't stop listening to Phantom of the Opera. I feel like my grip on controlling my life is slipping... I feel like I can't say or do anything to get it back... I have no power, I am just a crazy control freak that has no control over anything... Sigh.
How much will it cost to travel home?
From Denver to Miami it's like... 600-800 coach. Very depressing..
have you thought about moving back to Miami? As the character in Pilgrims Progress discovers he has an tendancy to move away from home when he is disstressed when he should have been moving towards home.
I would love to, but the economy is horrific down there... There are a couple of things tying me to this place and a couple of things tying me to that place. I kind of feel like I'm being ripped apart by the two, I wish i could combine them.
I've heard that people are the happiest in the location where they spent their teenage years. 14 to 18 years old.
hey sweetie, im sorry you're feeling so down. the holidays can be a pain cant they?
i too am spending the time apart from my loved ones. whereas i am with my parents id much rather be with my hubby and dog. ana my bday last week was miserable too, away from all my friends. so i feel you.
as you seem to have no chance of having everyone together, it really is about making the most of what you got there. could you try to make this time all about you and your bf? and maybe arrange/plan to see your friend and family soon after, them visiting you or vice versa in order to celebrate then? and in order to ahve something to look forward to rather than pining for these current days?
give it a thought, mikos!
xxxx
maedi