So here I am

Not sure how i got to this site but here I am quitting again. Can't quite seem to stay quit. I'd say over the last ten years i have quit for four. but I just can't really take that roller coaster anymore. Didn't draw up any elaborate plans this time. Support helps a lot. my wife get angry about the long *** process this has been and is worried. i don't smoke i chew - baseball playing days. going away for four days and i only do it if i am alone so i figure that will get me a little help with those first three with drawl days. i think i get how this site works. i am in one day at a time mode. if i can manage to get a run and meditate things go well. but life isn't always that easy. got young kids. just got laid off. i'll come back and check this on tuesday with five days under my belt - i think it will help get me to six and seven. there's just too much internal conflict that comes from doing something so negative...

have a great day whoever reads this

d

Hey! Congrats! I am on month three, but I had a slip up last week. I hope you great success in your struggle to kick the habit.

Marcus

thanks marcus - i would have come up empty without you. running on six days now. off to a job interview and a drive by the store. i am more worried about after the interview than before but with a little process here i should be ok for today. keep on

d

Hi drumon, Congratulations on 6 days! How have the last 6 days been for you? Did you quit cold turkey? I hope you continued success with this. I hope your job interview goes well. Keep us posted.

cold turkey here - that's the only way for me...tooth picks a pack of gum but for some reason i am not doing any of that stuff this time. the last six days have been good because we were visiting family and i would not have chewed anyway. it was tough to drive by the store and not digest getting through the emotional turbulence that a job interview can be without a pinch. i think i will miss those short snippits of time when it actually helped with perspective but i am looking forward to all the added time and energy i will gain from not. so today is where it needs to be.

thanks blu kit

d

nine days - wouldn't mind rewarding myself but won't. feels good. i was ready for sure. but day to day. i read other folks stories, it helps. there's a lot of suffering to life but also a lot of joy. i guess i should count my blessings and welcome day ten.

d