So My Boyfriend and I Broke Up...I Think?

Relationships Communication & Conflict Resolution
1

Okay so, if anyone has seen any of my other posts I might have mentioned that I had a boyfriend in them. Well...we broke up. At least I think we did. I won't make this a huge post but I'll just go ahead and explain how our relationship was:

We met on a dating site, and we connected instantly. We started texting and after about a week of texting, we decided to meet in person. It was amazing, we connected even more. He told me I was amazing and that he liked everything about me...and we soon fell in love with each other. It was my first real relationship, first physical and....first sexual relationship. So yeah, that makes this a little harder than it normally would be. Anyways, we had a little distance problem. It wasn't horrible or anything, but we didn't get to see each other as often as we would have liked. I thought...oh he'll understand that we should talk on the phone alot, instead of just texting because that will make the fact that we don't get to see each other alot easier to deal with...right? WRONG. He....made me feel so unimportant...like a movie or something like that was more important than talking to me on the phone. I didn't like it but...I just thought it was me overreacting and being clingy so I just berated myself for it and yeah. This past week has been really rough, his friends mom was in the hospital. And she died a few days ago. I tried to be as supportive as I could and be there for him when he needed me but did I get that in return? No. I got crap, and arguments. And him being immature. I'd tell him that I need to talk to him on the phone, I need his support right now and he'd just want me to text my problems to him. For one, it's so freaking annoying to text on my phone, the keyboard lags like crazy and two, it's alot to say and I'm not gonna kill my hands just to say it. How hard is picking up the phone and talking to your own girlfriend for say 10 minutes (which is all I asked for one day, just 10 freaking minutes and it was still too much to ask) to listen to her problems and make her feel better? I have **** going on too, with my dad, my school and the fact that we barely got to talk was taking a toll on me as well.

So....yesterday we finally talked on the phone after a week of barely even texting, and everything seem okay at the time. I had to get off the phone though because I went out with some friends to eat and it was kind of late when I got back so I wanted to call him, tell him I love him and tell him about my night before I went to sleep. And do you know what was more important than talking to me on phone? A movie. A stupid *** freaking retarded movie that I don't even know what it was but I hate it wish such a huge p***ion. I seriously could not believe that he would rather watch a movie than talk to me for 5 minutes before I went to sleep. Then I realized that...I'm more important than a movie and if he really cared about me, he'd realize that as well. So I told him that I'd call, and if he didn't answer I'd never bother him again. So I called...and he didn't answer. I was hurt and I cried alot at first...but right now, I feel strong, confident and most of all, I KNOW that I deserve way better than that. I deserve to be comfortable being myself, and to know that someone loves me even when I'm not being all that great. I deserve someone who wants to talk to me all the time and spend all his time with me (though I'd never make someone do that, just saying lol) I deserve to be given everything someone has to offer so that I can give them everything I have to offer. And I know that he is not the guy to do that. I don't know if we officially broke up but I'm just gonna ***ume that we did and...I'm going on a date tonight. I feel like I should wait but pfft, why should I really? He doesn't want to give me his time so why the hell should I give him mine? Someone else really likes me and wants to take me out and spend his time and money on me, why shouldn't I let him?

This has been an eye opening experience for me and I just wanted to say that girls and guys, if your special someone makes you feel like you have to watch what you say, that you have to stop being the way you are to prevent arguments, they're not the one for you. If someone really loves and cares about you, you will be able to be yourself and say what you wanna say without fear of what the consequences will be. NEVER feel like you have to change for someone, because you don't. They should accept you just the way you are and you need to feel like you want to change for YOU, not anyone else.

2

well, this is really benefitial to me and you too. Actually I just came out of a long relationship of 3 months because of the exact same to you, my partner refusing my help and when i tried and try to cheer her up, i got crap, And also i felt like i was an allaby for her emotions. I think this is guaranteed to be most the same for teens in the world because of thier hormones and stuff, things impact alot more and because of different people, they have thier own different ways of being and presenting myselves - the immature to maturity stage could effect this by increasing it.

3

I'm sorry to hear that Jamie. I wish people understood that their partners are someone they can rely on and confide in and stuff. Yes, teens have it rough with hormones. I'm still a teenager, though I haven't considered myself in that age group for a long time now (I'm 19.), but my ex was 24. He had no excuse for his immaturity lol I do agree with you, though.

4

I know exactly how you feel I met my ex 3 years ago and we've been on and off for 3 years but when I met him he didnt have a ride and neither did I so I really wasn't thinking too much about it until we started catching feelings for one another. We did our best to see one another. I was the type of female that was insecure and I was a virgin when I met him so I told myself maybe he's the one because he was working two jobs and I was complaining to him that we didn't have time for each other so he quit a job for me. To make a long story short we fell out and a couple of months ago we got back in contact and tried to work on things. So one day I went over his house and lost my virginity. He was soooo happy to see me he broke my virginity. I didn't know that it was gone happen. Like most females after they lose their virginity they regret it but I didn't. I know that he loves me but sometimes I ask myself is love good enough. He works from 11 at night until 7 in the morning so when he gets off he's tired and goes to sleep but I still feel like he can text me every chance he get, and he doesn't like to talk on the phone and that pisses me off because he play his game for hours but can't pick up the phone to call me.So when I have problems I have to talk to other people which is crazy to me because he's suppose to be my main supporter. All he wants to do is text and at times I have alot to text so I would rather talk to him on the phone. And we don't text alot and we barely see each other I have preached to him about this over and over and the only reason why I was tryna work things out was because I love him and he was my first. I'm the type of female that likes to spend time with my man. The tyoe of female that likes to hang out over each other houses. The type of female to talk on the phone for hours go places together but we don't do any of that now he mad and we haven't spoke in 2 days I'm really down to my breaking point. I feel like what one man want do another one will. I'm just tired of being depressed over this situation.I think Im about to call it quits.