A little history: my step dad has been an alcoholic for as long as I can remember (20 years). He has been to rehab and even hospitalized many times. The dr. told him if he ever drank again he would die yet he continues to drink. For many years I had to distance myself due to the stress it was causing me. He was working on getting sober and we started to get close again in the last 2 years. I now have a 14 month old son who has become very attached to him.
He has slipped back into the really bad drinking and is just going to sit on the couch and drink himself to death. He wont go outside excpet to drive to the store for booze. His skin is turning yellow due to liver failure and he is very unsteady when he trys to walk. My sister and I went over and tried to get him to go to the hospital but no luck. He keeps saying he is going to get help but I have not seen any improvements. What can I do to help him?
MomofMack, I am so sorry for what you are going through with your stepfather, that's such a difficult thing to deal with. Do you have any other family members or friends of his who can intervene? Is he willing to check into a rehab facility? I know that this can't be easy for you and your sister, but I would keep on him and keep trying until he gets the help that he needs. Otherwise, distancing yourself again is all that you can do, because you can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink. I think that it's so hard when someone knows that they need help but they don't do anything about it.
I wish that I had more options for you. I am hoping that one of our wonderful Supporters here will give you more insight and help.
I tried to get him to go to rehab but he has not worked in many years and my mom is not willing to pay for it again. You would think she would do what she could to help him but she has done it too many times and is done with him. Its rather sad that I reached out to many of my family members and got the same response form all of them. He wont stay sober so they dont want to get involved. My sister and I are the only ones willing to do anything to help.
Bless your heart and your sister's for all that you are doing and for not giving up on him. I know that I would never give up on someone who I love. Is there any way to get a counselor to come to his house or have you consulted an expert on what to do in this situation?
I was just thinking about this today. He has a counselor he worked with befor so I was trying to figure out how to do this. I need to get the number from my mom becuase I dont know who it is.
That sounds like a very good option momofmack. Best of luck with your stepdad....
HAPPY HEALTHY STRONG FREE
i know the feeling all too well of not knowing what to do to help someone you love, its so hard to watch them sit there and do it to themselves they don't think about what its like that you are going through day to day at seeing them like they are my partner is an alcoholic and has just been diagnosed with diabetes yet he is still continuing to drink though he has been told not to through his dr he is ignoring it all as though there is nothing wrong i so feel for you and your sister and as far as you're mum is concerned she sounds like me has probably given up trying as each time you try the harder it gets when they don't do something i have sat in tears night in night out just staring at him and wondering why he cant see the pain its causing but they will only do something when they are ready u cant force them sometimes they need to hit rock bottom to want the help and even though it is so hard stay strong for your sister and your mum and if he hits the rock bottom you will be there then and strong to help forcing it wont i don't think its hard but look after yourself too thinking of you through this time xx
wow heavy stuff ... i have 1 uncle that drank himself to death in his chair at home ..and one who has been sober for 25 yrs ??? im going with the latter .. i've been clean for 23 days and loving it .... so hard when you see someone going thru it ...at the end of the days its up to the person to sort it out ... i was drinking heavily for 17yrs ... i've scared the **** out of myself ..lost so so much along the way but i feel i've regained control of my life and i feel amazing ... i def have some moments but that just life .. i dont think there will be anything that would make me drink again .... nothing .... hope your ok ...
unfortunately sometimes you do all you can and then leave it (him) alone. you can't kill yourself trying to help someone that does'nt want to be helped hun. have an update?
dry in london....you'd be surprised what will make you drink again...my suggestion is stick with the one day at time hun, just for today.
Your right Kathy .. Thanks.. I tend to jump ahead alot .. Hence my drinking and drug taking .. Jump for quick hit or fix ... So nice to be free from that hellish life ... Sober 1 month today x