Tears of JOY

I told him! I told my boyfriend everything. Of course it was over skype since we are apart, but I told him.

I was afraid he would be angry at me for relapsing. I thought he would think I was weak. I was afraid he would leave me because this is the third time. Not Even Close.

He told me he knew. He told me to talk and let it all out and that he was there for me. I said I was sorry and I was happy he knew. He told me he was there for me- there to be my rock, my shoulder to cry on, and the person to dance with when I am sad! He made me smile.

I told him living with my parents screwed me all up. That the mirror lies to me now. That I don't feel beautiful. He told me that I was. That he is mad at my parents though they don't do it on purpose. He said I look beautiful when I am healthy and my normal weight. He told me he was here for me and would always be.

I am crying because I am so happy. So SO happy that I let it out. That I told the most important person in my life! That he is supportive. That he still loves me.

I am sorry. I just had to tell you guys that I finally told him. And I am sorry I write too much and have too many posts. I just have a lot to say apparently.

Its all looking up from here. I have so much more hope right now :) I have so much more to recover for.

Allee

Congrats. :)

And, don't worry about how much your write. We look forward to what you have to say.

allee...I can understand your relief! The mask of the ED is such a lonely one to wear, and isolates you from those you truly care about. Like your boyfriend said, he knew, so talking openly about it opened up the lines of communication with him. This is beautiful!
You have every reason to be proud and hold your head high...no apologies for YOU.....take care..Jan ♥

It's nice to hear you have such a good supportive boyfriend. Keep fighting!
:) Sonrisas

ALLE!!! YAY! CONGRATS! I'm so happy for you :D

Your post gave me chills as I read it because I have been in so many of the same situations. Keep up with this good communication. He is there for you, and he is right about all he says about you. You are beautiful :)

Thanks for putting a smile on my face this morning with such good news :)
Paige xoxo

yeah allee! good for you! this is a great thing to have a longer post about.... remember this spirit, it's great!

J

Congratulations! That's a huge step--and I bet it feels great! Please keep writing!

Allee

you are very lucky to have a guy that loves you and is supportive. I hoped for that but never got that response.In fact he was more concerned about a friend being so thin that it made me worse it made my ED stronger,it hurts to have someone you love not to be there for you. So treasure what you have you are blessed I am very happy for you that you have someone that will be supportive and loves you.
never apologise for writing too much it helps to release all your thoughts . You are beautiful..your pic is beautiful!~

allee---im so happy for you! this guy--well, HE IS A KEEPER ! just exactly what my finacee says to me... yes, we did luck out, ha...men love it when you look HEALTHY --not too thin.

im so happy you feel better-it must feel a weight has been lifted. i can feel your post feels--lighter...

dont apologize for writing too much! are you kidding? thats great!

love
maureen

Thanks guys!!! Sorry, I always think I write way too much. But this is honestly the only place I feel I can get these emotions out and also have those that understand me share that too.

YES you are so right Maureen! A weight- a huge weight- has been lifted off my shoulders. Its amazing! Yes I agree he is a keeper. I have no idea how I got so lucky. I ask myself everyday how I ended up with such an amazing person.

Thank you Grace for the picture comment! :)

allee