I was rejected for a job after 90 days because of low self esteem, low self confidence. Zoloft is keeping me from low depressions, but I'm not happy and can't remember when I was ever sure things would be all right. I hope this isn't just some place to whine about my problems--I need advise on how to feel better about my self in these hard financial times. There is no god or heaven, but we humans can make our lives hell.
welcome to the site!
i'm sorry you missed out on that job, i know how devastating in many ways that can be. how do you know you lost out because of your low self esteem? did you get feed back?
what do you think caused these negative feelings about yourself? tell us more and i hope we can help.
love
maedi
Yes, I did get feedback, and the staff is a medical professional group with doctors, nurses, and a psychologist. I know part of the reason was that I had to adjust to new medication (the Zoloft was adjusted) because my depression was active during the job search and interviews. Also I have no income now, I'm pretty sure my unemployment is used up. I was too dependent on the job for an income and every criticism was a stab to my heart. The anxiety made it harder for me to work and things went down from there. My ego seems to be connected with my income and I am anxious around supervisors and employers. I think my attitude was begging forgiveness for my shortcomings instead of what I could contribute to the team.
Freydis
That little devil sure can do "the same **** thing over and over again"... but your reconizing a few things, that are setting it off...that's important. It gives you insight on what you need too adjust and the changes needed. There may be a possibility here for disablity if you have a history; or your unable to work with people. Perhaps working on the ego should come first...where income will just follow. Best Wishes!
I've written in another post that I feel like a cartoon character that has been hit on the head by a hammer and is cracked like a porcilin vase, about to break up in pieces and swept under a rug. I seem to alienate others and they drop me. I can be a support to others when they come to me, but it's never vice-versa unless I go to a professional.
im sorry that you have had such bad experiences with people. i know what it feels like to be dropped by supposed friends.
do you not have any family that you can trust or rely on?
I can rely on my family for financial support if I can't find another way. They are also trying to keep my spirits up, but every one has their own lives to live and are working on their own relationships. If I can no longer pay rent, for example, I will probably live with my elderly mother and three adult siblings, but it would be crowded and I would not have my own space. It took me 30 years to leave home in the first place and my family as a whole is better for it. I don't feel I can confide my depressing feelings to them. They want me to be optimistic and have expressed admiration for me holding up so well.
Freydis
We all need attention....to be reconized...that's the human nature in us...and sometimes strave for. It never seem to come fast enough, your new and welcome here, just give it a little time. I personally have not seen any kind of alienation of others in your post, and remember people just don't drop you...they have their troubles and limited in time in this hectic world. Just keep trying...if the door don't work, come thru the window. Try a new approach. May I ask were are you from?
You are right, people don't reject me, they just don't have the time or energy to help me. That is why there are professionals--they can meter out time and energy to help others and not exhaust themselves. My job should not be where I get my self-esteem. I just feel worthless and worry that I will be a burden if I don't have an income and fear and anxiety overwhelm my confidence. I hope the school psychologist can help me get involved in something that will encourage me.
freydis, i too have to rely on my family financially as well as emotionally at the moment. i had to give up my job due to my depression/anxiety and now im waiting for IP so cant get going in another job. and yeah, i hate it too. i feel like a bum, to be honest, taking money from my parents when by now i should be the one providing for them. and living in my old room that i left 12 years ago. arghh!!
i too feel that i cannot bother them with my mental ongoings, especially my mom, cause she starts crying evertime i let out how down i really am. so i can totally understand that you want to rely on a professional for that!! but please know that i am still always here to listen and help wherever i can!!
love
maedi
It helped to talk with a counselor at my school. I know I'm doing the right things now and I can get some therapy and start again.
Rough stuff. I have no parents to go to. My last job destroyed my reputation n now no one will hire me. When my unemployment runs out I willlose my house car teeth etc man I'm negative n afraid I only work parttime now. Most day I have trouble coping.I see no light at the end of the tunnel
Have you been diagnosed with major depression. It might be possible to get disability.
I don't want disability. I want my life back. I'm a good worker n a good person. The manager who destroyed me was a crazed evil freak. I don't want disability. I'm not disabled even if I do have some depression. I'm not disabled I was destroyed professionally n of course I'm depressed. I've lost my health care 401k paid vacations a great paycheck an interesting job n seeing friends at work. Of course I'm depressed. N now no one will hire me n that is wrong. I'm not disabled n I don't want disability. I want a life. My life back
I can't figure this out.
I'm sorry things r so difficult for u. I don't understand hpwvlow self esteem hurt u at work. U r free to have any self esteem uve got n it's not ur employers business. The level of ur self esteem should not threaten ur job. Ur self esteem is no one elses business (unless u chose to share it with them. How did ur self esteem threaten ur job. I don't understand. U r free to possess any self esteem at all and not have ur job threatened.
I'm looking into something called EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. It is a form of therapy used for PTSD. Has anyone heard of this? I'm thinking all of us with depression and low-self-esteem have been traumatized and constantly react to triggers that keep us this way. It looks promising from the online research.