hi, im new to this site and i wanted to know more about my ocd and if i can get help. im 15 and i vision terrible visions of violence, i also have the obsession of touchin something 4 times then mirroring it again with my other hand. please help i dont know how much more i can take
Hi mat123 I am just presuming you no what OCD is and There is treatments available. So I will give a brief explanation of what treatments I no of .
The first one is drugs.Legal drugs prescribed by your GP (doctor) called anti-obsessional medication or anti depressants .These work pritty well at controlling my OCD but these kind of treatment drugs take time to take effect (UP TO 12 WEEKS).
fluoxetine (Prozac)
fluvoxamine(Faverin)
sertraline(Lustral)
paroxetine (Seroxat)
citalopram (Cipramil).
The above drug treatments are prescribed by your GP.
People with OCD improve with medication.People who do respond to this kind of treatment may find that there is about 50% reduction in OCD symptoms.
The second Treatment is Cognitive Behaviour Therapy.
Sufferers of OCD learn new techniques and strategies and ways to change their thinking patterns and habits. They are taught to think and respond differently than they have in the past.
Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) concentrates on helping people to discover and identify and look at and question their irrational thoughts. This therapy can constrain and rework these thought patterns. For example, If some one has a phobia about using and visiting a public toilet are encouraged to visit and use a public toilet. In uncomplicated terms it is used to change a negative thoughts to a positive one.
Sadly these kinds of treatments take time but are quite effective. They do work.
I am hoping that you have visited your GP and hopefully he or she has got you a phschological therapist because this is the first step in getting the maximum help for you. My phschological therapist is brilliant and it give me a person to talk to about my OCD, some time talking and explaining your feeling helps a little.
I would like to send you my best wishes and I hope that you get all the help you need.OCD is a part of my life and has been for many years I have my ups and downs just like every one but with the help around me it deos get easyier.
thank yo this is very helpful but is there any self help sort of cognitive therepy like you said with the phobia and i dont have a GP because i havent told my parents about it
Hi again mat123
The violence obsessions can be pretty tricky to understand. Those going through violence obsessions are persecuted with visions of causing harm or assaulting a loved one, hurting some every day person and all sorts of terrifying thoughts that sufferers would in reality never act upon but cannot control these obsessional thoughts.
You have the thoughts of carrying out violence to a person and you have developed compulsive defense mechanisms in the hopes of avoiding these violent thoughts. You touch things 4 times then you do the exact thing again with my other hand. This is your defence against theses thoughts.
In order for you to seek help for theses thoughts you have to seek help with a doctor or heath worker. I no OCD is called the silent illness I have kept my OCD silent from my friends and partners because of my rituals which I perform. My ex friends and partners used to redicule me about my rituals and make fun of me. I feel my OCD is shamefull which is totally wrong and I understand you may feel the same way but to go forward from your OCD you will have to tell people about your OCD and your thoughts. The first people to tell is your parents. This is going to be hard for you but we are here to help you though this.
Your parents will be shocked by what you tell them but they will help you seek advice and guide you in getting help.
It may be a good idea to get your parents some where quiet and you tell them of your violent thoughts they will understand. I told my best friend because if I didnt I do not think I would be here today and my friend talk to me made me and made me feel a little better about what i did and my friend got hold of my hand and walked me to my doctor. that was my first step. Your first step is to do the same.
Sorry but you may have to do the same. If you feel you cannot tell your parents then please tell me and other in this support group why. Because I personally dont want you to go through your OCD by yourself.
I look forward to hearing from you and I will hope that you can tell your parents.
Any help I can offer I will gladly give and if you feel you cannot tell your parents try directly pointing them here to this support website and say this is me.
I hope this has helped a little and if your parents are reading this then please ask us and we will help you always.
thank you soo much this has give me so much courage to tell them but how should i bring it up and what if they think im just crazy or insane
Hi mat123,
I am glad to hear from you and as a positive start to this letter I would like to say well done because gaining that bit of courage takes you a step closer.
Telling any one about OCD and your compulsions or obsession can be hard because like you I have irrational thoughts and when I try to explain my thoughts they think i am crazy and a bit mad but I am not same as you.
This is where information come in to play I am not sure if I put a website address on here it mite not show up but I will give it a go http://www.mylifewithobsessivecompulsivedisorder.com/ this is my diary of my OCD it has some information on OCD and treatments. Also show them this website they can always ask questions and get answers .
Now I would like to help with telling your parents. If you are closer to your mum then tell her or if your closer to your farther then tell him what is happening and what your thoughts are. do it in a quite place and when she/him isnt busy. How you approach it is the hard bit. Try and explain that you have a problem with thoughts of violence which are obsessive and tell her about how you cope with these thoughts (your touching objects) she/him will be shocked they may have questions they may be inquisative so you hav to expect some difference of oppinions. They are your parents I have a daughter and I am sure that your parents are like me they will want to get you any help you may need just like I would do with my daughter.
If you find this dirrect approach a little hard then show them this page and tell them this is me I need some help.
I will be here if they want to ask questions all they hav to do is write a letter and I will respond. This maybe the easy way and I hope that they will be able to ask question and hopefully that will lead to some medical help for you.
Keep up the good work .
i cant find the courage to tell them ive tried so hard but right when im about to i just say nevermind...
Hi mat123
Never mind then mat123 I dont want to put you under more anxiety about telling your parents. In time you will be able to explain to your parents what you are going threw but lets find out if there is a reason or a trigger for your violent thoughts. May I ask when you have these thoughts of violence what actually goz of.
Try and explain where you was, what was happening and how much it effected you and how you felt during and after the event. We may find that some thing is triggering these episodes like school , exams or some thing else .
Try to be open about it and the more information I have then the more of a solution can be found.
I no this is personal to you and i am sorry to ask for details about it but If there is some thing that triggers it the there will be a way for you to re analize your thoughts.
There is a breathing exercise which mite help
Here goz.
Find a nice quiet place your bedroom or dinning room some where you can be alone.
Lie down or sit relaxed do not cross your arms let them relax a flop to your sides.
Now take 7 deep normal breaths and think about the feeling of your breath.
Take a breath inward and feel how your lungs expand.
Then breath out and feel and remember how your breath feels like.
Take another breath inwards then let your breath out and remember how that breath felt like.
Imagine a balloon in your belly and with every breath you take in the ballon rises and remember that feeling and when you breath out the balloon deflates and simply remember how that feels.
Continue breathing normally and with every breath concerntrate on how that breath feels like .
The balloon rising and falling with every breath.
You will have moments where thoughts will enter your head but simply let your thoughts enter your head and then let it fall away bringing your thoughts back to your breathing.
And continuing concerntrate on your breathing and when a Thought eneter your head let it simple fall away and go back to concerntrating on your breathing.
Feeling that balloon rise and fall with every breath.
do this for 10 to 20 minutes about 4 times a day it takes practise concerntrating on your breathing so please dont feel like you have failed when your mind wanders away to your thought we all do it every body do this but simply go back to concerntrating on your breathing.
Over time you will get into the routine of relaxing and concerntrating on your breathing and when you have theses thoughts of violence simply go to your quiet place and concerntrate on your breathing.
This will get easyer as you do it and I no it sounds silly to do but it deos relax you and it deosnt take the violent thoughts away but when you do this breathing exercise the violent thought will enter your head and you simply let them faid away and go back to concernytrating on your breathing.
I will do some more research on how your thoughts are and I will try and get back to you with some more information.
In the mean time try and let me no what I asked at the begining of this message and i will see if I can see a trigger point.
Well done in trying to tell your parents I no that must have been hard but dont feel like you have let yourself down because you havent keep positive. :-) .
thank you so much for the breathing excersize i tried it right after and it really helps! the earliest memories i think were in 5th grade at night i would constantly imagine people coming in and killing me and thats when it started or atleast the earliest memories of it. and thank you so much for all that you done for me.
Hi mat123
Sorry I am from the UK so I am presuming that 5th grade your age would have been 10 to 11 years old ?.
Was there anything happened before or during those years 10 to 11.
Some thing mite have happen before you had your first thoughts. Like some one died, you saw a accident where some one died, was every thing in school going ok No bullying or anything like that anything at all ?.
Some times people start having theses compulsions because of issues that happen to them or they new about.
I couldnt read when I was 12 to 13 years old and when my teacher found out i couldnt read he shouted and made me feel very stupid and thick infront of a class. I ran of to the toilets and he followed and continued verbally calling me names I wasnt scared but annoyed and angry and that anger came out and I hit him ( I am not saying hitting a teacher was the right thing to do but I thought It was). Any way thats when some of my obsessions and compulsions started. I have this great fear or public toilets and being contaminated. I personally believe that what happen in that toilet with my bully of a teacher was a part of me being OCD. I no this may sound strange but that is what I think . I went threw a trauma with my teacher and my farther about not being able to read and the actions of these people made me like I am today.
So some thing like that may have happened to you. Keep up with the breathing exercise do it 3 or 4 time a day and when you have the thoughts that some one wants to hurt you you will have a little exercise to take your mind of the thoughts. Its not a cure but its called a distraction thing.
You think about some thing different ( breathing)and you consentrate on that something and when your violent thoughts come into your head you hav the power to let them in and then simply let them fade away and you go back and concerntrate on your breathing.
After practise it deos work.
:-)
im sorry but i cant remember and incedents that mightve started it but my brother died before i could meet him and i think about him time to time
im going to tell them tonight wish me luck
HI matt123 how did every thing go with telling them hope every thing went ok .
hi matt and ocdmylife.. I have read your conversation (sorry to be nosy) but i can relate to matt in a lot of ways..... i have no idea how to approach my parents.. my dad was joking about me having ocd today and i tried to tell him that yes, i really do but he doesnt listen. I just dont know what to do next.
Hi britt54.
Telling people about OCD is so hard I personally no this.
Its the feeling of telling some one about these irrational thought , obsession and compulsions because they will think your mad. We are not mad we are the special people because we have a illness which in time we will control and the people who say things bad about OCD are the people lower than us.
That may sound nasty but I honestly dont mean it to be.
Your dad knows you have OCD but just jokes about it. Maybe thats how he cope with things like that.
So if your dad has a joke about your compulsions and obsession why not try having a joke with him about your thoughts and rituals. It may sound strange because OCD is not a joke but if your dad understands why you are joking about it he mite come to terms with your ocd.I hope you manage to get some where with your OCD and I hope you can find some help with controlling your OCD. Remember you can always write about your feeling here ask question because we understand thing with OCD. If you need any advice or support we are always here for you.
i know wish i kept it a secret:/
Hi Matt123
I am so sorry to hear that it didnt work out telling your parents. It is a big shame that they cannot understand your feelings. Some people are like that. I have many people in my life but a vast majority think and treat me with contemp because of my OCD. They often say "its all in your head" "Mark you need searious mental heath treatment"
"Mark your made" so please dont be disheartened. Hopefully in time when you and you alone have gain the knowledge to control your irrational and ocd thoughts you will be able to hold your head up even higher and say "I matt123 did that" and you will be proud.
I am doing some research into how to control violent thoughts and hopefully soon I will have some more information to hand to hopefully guide you in find a way to control and manage theses thoughts and compulsion. I will let you no hopefully very soon. I am visiting a cognative therapy seminar in two weeks so hopefully I will have some useful information to pass onto you.
Hang in there matt123 I no its harrd but always remember we are here to listen and to help and be supportive so any time you feel down post a message. I understand that it isnt a cure for it but the support will help.
Well done Matt123 be strong and always hold your head up high.
thank you so much and i wish you goodluck on your research and i hope u can find something
hey ocdmylife, i was reading your blog/website and i read your latest post and i want you too know your not worthless youve helped so many people on here and that you are an icredible person and i and other people believe in you
Hello All, I am new here and have recently added OCD to the list of anxiety diagnosis. I am 38 and had first panic attack when 19. Hid it for years but never obsessed about it either. 6-7 months ago my fiance was diagnosed with sarcoid and my anxiety has gone thru the roof. I have had bouts of agoraphobia in the past but have only used meds once,which helped but am now so afraid of. I obsess about death and my fear of it, about meds and the peer pressure to take them. I actually fear getting too far from my mother which whom I have never gotten along with and is my biggest trigger but cannot break the safe person attachment and it is ruining my once very passionate, spontaneous, fun filled life. Now I worry about EVERYTHING!! Weather,fog,snow,kids dying,fiance dying, pills making me sick, you name it I obsess about it.I have a ton of family but mostly naysayers or self medicators. I have been prescribed every pill in the book but cannot get them in my mouth. I finally started xanax .125 and now only .5 as needed max 1.5 in a day after 3 n half years. I also have a new counselor that wants to do emdr therapy. Does anyone relate to such overwhelming and debilitating anxiety and have/how have you gotten better. I'm also long winded, shoulda warned u in the beginning.